Hot & Heavy (Eren x Reader)

Chapter 38 - Oh Love

If it hadn't been for the sounds of tumbling steps down the worn-out staircase and the cheers of celebration from the only other people in Colt's home, there was no telling just how far things could have gotten.

"Happy new year!!" Falco and Gabi cheered.

You flew off Colt's lap like a mouse nearly escaping a trap, combing down the ends of your hair and straightening out the wrinkles in your clothes.

You and Colt weakly joined in their exclamation, trying to catch your breaths. They ran past you, straight to the backyard and you could hear the sounds of explosions and fizzles coming from outside.

The corner of your mouth twitched upwards as a small memory you had forgotten trickled its way into your mind. It was a precious one where you had found yourself in the shoes of those two kids and a different set of lovers on the couch. Where instead of loud celebration and tromping through the house, it was sneaking suspicion and a scramble back due to an older brother's rage.

It felt blurry and disconnected, slowly fizzling out in place of your most recent excursion. Almost like finding and replacing a piece of a puzzle you had sworn was the perfect match with its actual pairing. The feeling of Colt's warm hand fitting together with yours completed the image and you could feel him tugging you along down another new path.

"Let's go see the fireworks," Colt said, and you easily followed.

You stepped into the backyard where Falco and Gabi were ignoring the bright moon that hung above your heads. You had noticed that the stars had a harder time shining in the city, but standing there amongst new catalysts for unforgettable memories, you didn't mind anymore. You watched as the backyard lit up with colours of purples, reds, and yellows. The sounds of banging and distant celebration from fellow neighbours watching the spectacle filled your ears.

You felt new, you felt real, you felt present. There was no other way you could have rung in the new year. Your eyes left the sky for just one moment to find where the wiggling sensation in your hands came from. At the source was a smile that wasn't for the fireworks or the new year.

It was for you.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

January meant blistering colds that burned as hot as the sun, a different course schedule that reinvented your tempo, and a peace in your heart that you'd never felt before. New year, new you, new love that found you discovering more pieces of yourself every day. The more of your past that you let go, the messier the process. Breaking old habits, the urge to run away and question everything, they all held you back. It felt ugly, and raw, and almost unbearable.

Along the way was Colt, reminding you that there was more than one way to love and be loved.

You remember Colt telling you early on New Year's Day, tangled in the sheets of his bedroom, "I'm glad that you stayed with me. I'm glad that you're here."

They were only simple words that seemed to easily flow out of his mouth. There was a subconscious part in your mind that wondered what life could have been like if you went home for the holidays. You could have seen your family, your friends, those you loved the most. The way he traced your hairline with a delicate finger and how his legs slotted themselves between yours to hook at the knees made you feel that love you gave too easily to others finally turn on yourself.

You remembered what Nicolo told you at Sasha's birthday in the summer. "Marley's great and all, but my heart is here. I don't think I can go back now that everything I've ever wanted is here."

At the time you couldn't comprehend leaving absolutely everything you had ever known behind. There were too many stakes, too many eggs in one basket, and too many memories that shaped you into the person you were today.