On the Way Down

Chapter Ten

The bedroom is still dark when I next open my eyes. I must have rolled over at some point, because my head is against a pillow now, and I'm facing the bedside table I left my phone on.

There's also a buzzing sound I can't place. Is my phone making the noise? Or is it Phoenix's phone, wherever that ended up after I moved it? My eyes scan the darkness for the source.

It takes a second, but my sleep-addled brain finally recognizes what I hear is a chainsaw. The sound is from outside somewhere, and not from something in the room, but it's loud. No wonder I woke up.

I turn over to see if Phoenix is awake and discover his side of the bed is empty. Did he end up on the sofa? Things between us were peaceful when I drifted off last night, so I know I didn't kick him out. Maybe he couldn't sleep. I reach over to touch the indentation on his pillow. It's still warm, which means he couldn't have left very long ago.

The sound of running water interrupts my thoughts. I listen more closely, and I barely make it out over the revving from the chainsaw, but now I realize Phoenix is brushing his teeth in the bathroom. What time is it that he's already up?

I'm debating between reaching for my phone to check the time and pulling the duvet over my ears to muffle the chainsaw noise, when a sliver of light spills into the room. It only lasts for a split second—long enough for me to also realize the power is back on—and then Phoenix emerges from the bathroom, wearing a bathrobe. He glances at the bed as he heads toward the bedroom door, then stops when he sees me watching him.

"Hey." My voice is raspy from sleep.

"Hey. Did I wake you up?" He changes direction and walks over to the bed. The mattress dips slightly when he sits next to me.

"No, I think it was the chainsaw."

"I was just going to check on that and see if someone is removing the tree. Go back to sleep if you can. It's early." He brushes a strand of my hair away from my eyes, then rests his hand against my cheek.

I turn my head and touch my lips to his palm. It happens like a reflex, and before I'm aware I'm doing it, much like my wandering hand last night. Again with the old habits. It feels like we've rewound time.

I move my head again, so my mouth isn't against his hand. "Are you coming back to bed?"

"I'll be back in a minute." He leans over and drops an air-light kiss on my forehead.

Maybe it's the feeling of waking up in his bed, after falling asleep in his arms. Maybe it's how gentle he's being with me, or that I'm coming down from the emotional rollercoaster of yesterday and recalling what he said last night. Whatever it is, I suddenly want to nudge his head down so his mouth covers mine.

He stands up before I decide if I should act on the impulse or not. Then I remember I've been asleep for several hours. If this is a sign of how the morning might go, I should also brush my teeth to be prepared.

I wait for Phoenix to leave the room, and then I slip out from under the duvet and head for the bathroom. He's already back when I return, his bathrobe strewn over the chair in the corner. He tries to keep a straight face while I climb into bed, but it's obvious he heard what I was doing and likely suspects why.

"Don't act like you didn't brush your teeth five minutes ago," I tell him.

He laughs softly at this. "I didn't say anything."

"Your face gave you away. I could ask why you did it first at whatever ungodly hour of still-dark-outside it is, you know."

"You could. And it's five-thirty."