Invisible String | Emily Prentiss x Reader

twenty seven

"I-I never got to tell her that I love her." I choked out.

"She knows. I promise you she knows." JJ, rubbing my arm.

"YOU DON'T KNOW THAT! I- I was going to wait for the perfect time to tell her. She... she's the one for me. The one I've waited my whole life for and- and I didn't want to say it too soon and scare her off. But now I may never have the chance to tell her how much she means to me. I- I thought I had more time. I need more time with her." I sobbed into JJ's shoulder. Usually in moments like this I would compartmentalize my emotions but that obviously isn't working. I felt like a draw bridge had erupted through my body and years of pent up emotions were coming out.

"Emily. When Y/n comes out of surgery, when not if. You are going to sit by her bed and tell her how much you love her. Do you hear me? You haven't lost her."

I don't know how long I sat there sobbing, but after while the tears started to stop and I pulled away from JJ. I could see the exhaustion in her body and her eyes were rimmed with tears. "Thank's" I muttered and JJ just gave me a half-hearted smile that sent guilt throughout my entire body.

"How are you holding up JJ?"

"I'm okay. I'll be better once I see her with my own eyes." JJ said with a sad shrug.

"Me too. Lets get back to the waiting room." I said as I forced myself off the ground and helped JJ up. I refused to look into the mirror as we walked out. I couldn't handle seeing the blood. But for some fucked up reason I couldn't take my clothes off. The blood was a tiny part of Y/n that I still had with me.

I decided to sit next to Spencer as I could see the tears in his eyes. I grabbed his hand and he reluctantly let me. I felt detached from my body as we waited. Hours passed, or maybe they were minutes, I wasn't sure. I could feel tears starting to fall again and I briefly felt Spencer wiping them off my face. "She's going to be okay." He said, squeezing my hand. "She has to be." He muttered as he went back to shaking his leg up and down.

Another two hours went by and we were all still in the waiting room. I don't know when, but JJ had sat in the seat next to me and held onto my other hand. In an odd way it felt nice to be comforted by Spencer and JJ. Usually I was the one doing the comforting. 

"You must be Y/n Y/l/n's team. I'm Dr. Foster." A doctor said and we all immediately shot up from our chairs.

"Yes, that's us." I said trying to put on a strong voice trying not to act as if he next words would either destroy me or relieve me.

"I'm happy to inform you that Y/n made it through the surgery and is being transported to the ICU." The doctor said and I felt relief in my body for the first time.

"When can we see her!?" I asked immediately.

"After I give you a run down of her condition" He said stiffly and I felt my body freeze again. Spencer squeezed my hand but my heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest.

"She suffered two gunshot wounds, one of which shattered her collarbone and the other just above it on her shoulder. Thankfully, no major organs were hit but she did hit a major artery which is what caused her heart to stop. We were able to stop the bleeding and reconstruct her collarbone which is now being held together by metal rods. She also has a couple of cracked ribs from the CPR but they should heal on their own." He said and once again relief filled my body. She was okay. She's okay.

"She has a couple months of recovery ahead of her, but other than that she's going to be perfectly fine. She should be waking up from the anesthetics within the next hour. I can take you guys to her if you want, although I recommend one visitor at time for these first few hours." The doctor said and we all nodded. He led us up the hallway and to her room.