Little Bitch

Chapter 42

I turned around, looking at her, a grin automatically appearing on my face.

I looked at the clock, thinking for a second that I had been lost in thought a lot longer than I had realized, but noticed it wasn't even noon yet. "You got here early," I pointed out. "I was going to wait for you by the stairs."

Lexi smiled at me, walking up to me. "No worries. So, is this part of my birthday present?" she asked, motioning to the piano with her chin, sitting beside me.

I laughed. I really hadn't planned on being here, so this was definitely not one of my presents.

"Naw, not really."

"Have you been playing?" she asked softly, knowing this might be a sensible subject.

I sighed, running a hand over my head. "No, mostly just staring at the keys. I wonder if I'm still able to play," I admitted.

I didn't really feel like getting into what I had been thinking earlier. Today wasn't about me. And I didn't really feel like talking more about it was going to change anything anyway.

My Pumpkin leaned her head against my shoulder. "I'm sure you are."

And here she was, comforting me again, when it was her birthday, and I should be the one doing it because she was missing her mother.

It still couldn't believe this wonderful girl was my girlfriend, and that she loved me.

So even if I hadn't played in so long, I could do this for her. I should get over my trauma, little by little, after all, if I wanted to get better. "I don't want snobby comments if I'm a total fail, alright?" I warned her teasingly.

My Pumpkin grinned at me, nodding quickly. "Alright."

I didn't have that many options when it came to playing something without having the partition in front of me. There was one piece I knew almost by heart though, one my father had made me repeat over and over again.

Arguably an easy one.

One Lexi would recognize immediately.

Für Elise.

Slowly, I let my fingers press down on the keys, my feet finding the pedal, letting the sounds fill the room.

And just like that, I was a kid again, playing happily.

I hadn't gone through anything bad. I had my brother and my parents that hadn't disappointed me yet. I didn't know grief yet. I didn't know what it felt like to hit rock bottom.

My head was fine. My traumas were only in the form of the teasing my brother and Josh inflicted me.

I was happy and playing an instrument I loved.

Music filled the room, while Lexi's eyes filled with tears.

I noticed it, at the corner of my eye.

I felt bad. Was I making her emotional and thinking about her mom?

Or was I just really really bad?

I didn't sound that bad.

Finally, I stopped playing, and Lexi wasn't saying anything, just staring at me basically on the verge of crying.

"Should I be assuming I wasn't that bad, or that it was so awful that it made you cry?" I asked, wiping one of her tear with my thumb.

Way to start her birthday...

"You know how I love you, but right now I hate you. How can you be this good, it's impossible," Lexi grumbled, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand.