AVATAR TWOW: Torn between the 2

Chapter VII| Shame

A O' N U N G
Shame
PT2

I AM ASHAMED as his eyes look at me. I sit in quietude, eating my breakfast slowly, the events of last night playing like some song my mother would sing to me when I was small. Tender and soulful, though back then, it was my least-liked song of hers. I would always urge her to sing me another one about sacrifice and warrior-like.

It's not those touches we shared that make me ashamed or the fact he saw me cry—but rather my thoughts that overcame. Thick and engulfing, and unable to waver away from. They are like the sea, never stopping to spurt in like the tides. Salty to the mouth, but scattering like the beautiful luminescent life far below the sea.

I figure Neteyam is like the sea. Calm, and pragmatic. Soulful and inclined, but dangerous like when you slip away and the sea drowns you far. Like when the currents suck you in, and you're hit with helplessness as you're tumbling, trying to regain your surface, but the sea is stronger than you.

He sucks you in. It's his charm. His persona works in favor. His eyes work feelings, riling any Na'vi his way. I too, am dumb, having seen that maybe I'm not so different. I'm his next victim, day after day, unable to snap from the spell he doesn't know he possesses.

"Are you okay?" He asks with worry. I slowly nod.

"...I can forget about it...if you want. That you ever cried..."

"No need," I deadpan.

"Then...can you talk to me?"

I sigh and place my food aside. I make a home in his lap, all too quick to ponder, and I don't know why I did it, but something pulled me towards it. Like an urge. His lap is cuddly, and maybe it's because I'm tired, but I quickly doze away...

"Just for a bit," I murmur.

His fingers trace the swirls in my face, and I drowsily stare, just as he diverts his gaze.

"You won't see me for a while. I'll be busy with my younger brother, preparing him for his Iknimaya. It is my duty as the oldest...I'll still drop by to give you food, but I will not be staying." He says. His voice sounds far, almost muffled from the ringing of my ears.

"I'll miss you as much as I hate to admit it," I say, chuckling melancholically. I try to offer a genuine smile, but it doesn't happen. My eyes don't pull at my cheeks like they usually do, and my mouth doesn't stretch as wide.

His thumb caresses my philtrum. My lips slightly part. I feel them tingling and puckering ever so slightly. I stare at his eyes that are set upon my lips. It makes me wonder if he treats other Na'vis the same (as unlikely as it sounds).

It makes me wonder why I am the Na'vi he decides to treat this way—tender and babyish. We've only known each other for a week, but It feels like more. Like years.

He leans and his braids dangle like always. "You're easy to draw," He laughs.

I tilt my head, baffled, but I cannot stop the laughter that roars through my chest, "What does that mean? Sky people saying?"

"It means you're..."

"I'm a what?" I inquire.

He shrugs, "Ugly. Hate to break it to you, fish boy."

"Ha-Ha!" I exclaim sarcastically and slap his lean chest, "Comedian level."

"I know," He deadpans, chest-puffing with comical pride. I roll my eyes and tuck my left arm under my head for more cushion.

His fingers wrap around my necklace, twirling the tooth around his blue fingers as he examines it.

"It's a Tsurak tooth. Father made it for me." I say with gloom, lowering my gaze with reminisce. "I've yet to tame my own."

His ears perk. "You're not a man yet?" He asks with marvel. His hand rests on my sternum. I can yank his hand off any second, any minute, but I don't. I want it to linger there. I love the scorching feel that lights through me, and the delicate stutters of my heart.

"I failed the first time. I'm hard-headed as you can see," I almost grin.

He laughs. "Yeah? Well, I like you that way. You're fun."

"Just fun?"

"Fun and stupid," He says.

I smile faintly and tap his chin for brief seconds. The touch seems to go in slow-mo, as I feel every fragment of electrifying warmth dance about my fingertips. His chin is soft and warm like the rest of his body. His chin is sharp despite looking soft in feature.

We fall into a delightful hush. We both don't say any more else.

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