Chapter 19:breath in breath out

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My dad and Vanessa ended up having sex that night...

The next morning....

As my dad woke up he put his pants on and went out to the kitchen where he began to smell food,

Vanessa:goodmorning

My dad then went and sat at the counter,

My dad:goodmorning

Vanessa:oh man you turned me inside out last night you were a animal

My dad:well thank you i guess

Vanessa:and let me guess you got a girlfriend?

My dad:ex girlfriend

Vanessa:when did yall break up?

My dad:last night

Vanessa:thats quick don't you think that not even a whole 24 hrs before we had sex

My dad:what else am I suppose to do

Vanessa:you gotta find another out let other in Vaginas

My dad:let what sex heals everything

Vanessa:for what a hour then you feel liek shit again

My dad:then what am i suppose to do

Vanessa:do you exercise?

My dad:of course gotta keep this figure

Vanessa:boy bye

Thats when they both started to laugh,

Vanessa:where does your joy lie?

My dad:it lies with Carmen

Vanessa:who that

My dad:my died wife

Vanessa:thats what it is

My dad:what you mean?

Vanessa:did you love her?

My dad:wity every fiber of my being

Vanessa:then you gotta let her go

My Dad:how this wasnt just another one of my whores this was my wife who had 3 of my kids we hada life together

Vanessa:im this life were gona loses people thats just the way of it we just gotta be strong about it

My Dad:i guess your right

Vanessa:but tell me is that all that's bothering you

My Dad:i mean yeah i guess

Vanessa:naw it's something else

My Dad:what you mean?

Vanessa:i see alot of hurt and pain in you and it reaches farther then just your wife?

My Dad:i mean i had a rocky child hood but i got over it

Vanessa:did you really cause it seems like you haven't truly let go your still holding on to scarred emotions

My Dad:maybe

Vanessa:you know what i got just the thing for you lets go.....

Vanessa got the keys to my car and we drove up to this large mountain,

And once we got to it Vanessa said,

Vanessa:were gonna climb this

My dad:were gonna do what

Vanessa:come on

My dad:fine

Thats when My dad anf Vanessa began making there way uo the mountain....

It took them 2 hours to get all the way up and my dad was winded,

My dad:how did i let you get me on this fucking mountains you know that black people are scared of every fucking thing

Vanessa:this is gonna help you

My dad:what am I supposed to do

Vanessa:let it out talk to the clouds its just you and the sky

My dad:ok this is stupid

Vanessa:just try it

Thats when my dad looked uo to the sky and said,

My dad:dad if you can hear me or whatever i just wanna say that you died before could fully repair our relationship and i hate that because we were doing so well but i gotta tell you you fucked me up real bad

After my dad said that he began to tear up,

My dad:i was scared to hold my kids im scared for my kids cause i dont want nothing bad to happen to them but i failed I cant protect them and I almost lost my son my flesh and blood i cant lose my kids there all i got left besides my brother everyone else is gone my wife is gone .....
Carmen you left me to do this by myself and i hate you for that.... I had to raise a whoel bradny bunch by myself and the fucked up part about it all is that the girls look just like you and i gotta look at thise faces everyday and its just a reminder of what i lose.....Simone is doing greay but she doesn't know that she's not mine she. Doesn't know that she came from rape and I can't help but see that mothefucker fats when i look at her sometimes cause Simone looks just like him and his twisted ass family Fats som raped our daughter what a coincidence....i got the motherfuckers lock up and behind bars he took everything from her my poor girl maybe I should have layed more attention to them but ther eonly so much i could do i did my best but there things i can't teach like stuff about their bodies mad they missed out on alot,and I didn't have them the talk which is my bad everything they know they seen it online and a child shouldn't learn about sex that way....Carmen my sweet baby girl i gotta let you go for me and for my kids i have so much hate in my heart and its caused me to close everyone out cause I'm scared I can't lose anyone else....

And thats when My dad stop for a second then let out a scream......

After he did that he turned back to Vanessa and said,

My dad:omg i feel a little lighter i needed that

After my dad did that Him and Vanessa headed back to the apartment....

My dad:thank you so much Vanessa

Vanessa:you welcome now i want you to go back to that girl and fix it

My dad:what you mean

Vanessa:the night you broke up with that girl is the same night we had sex

My dad:and

Vanessa:you love that girl and you know it your just broken

My dad:who are you doctor fix all my problems?I can't just go back to her and my daughter

Vanessa:and you got a baby by this girl Fix It

My Dad:ok

Thats when my dad decided to head back to the hotel,

Once he got there he went inside there room,

And takes when he saw Jayde sleeping on the bed peacefully with there daughter beside her,

He then went and say beside her as he began to tap ok her,

My dad:jayde....jayde

Thats when she woke up,

My dad:jayde its me

Jayde:what do you want?

My dad:look i'm sorry and I don't want this to end i love you and i wanna fix this please i really do

Thats when jayde sat up and hugged him,

Jayde:if you want this to work then you gotta get help baby

My dad:i will I promise just please stay with me

Jayde:I'm not going nowhere baby

My dad:i slept with someone last night

Jayde:ok we can get over as long as thats the first and last time

My dad:i promise.....

That very day they headed back to Houston,

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