Epilogue

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Since returning home to mom, I had first avoided sleep and then grew to dread it

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Since returning home to mom, I had first avoided sleep and then grew to dread it. Sleeping seemed to be the closest I've ever come to visiting that ethereal realm again, and as real as that place was, when I had been forced to wander it, the presence of it in my dreams only reminded me how close to death I had come.

The darkness of that place was not as welcoming as I assumed after hearing accounts from people online who claimed to experience near death experiences and the like. The dark, misty space was the opposite of extended meadows, golden sunshine, and brilliant rainbows they used to describe the afterlife.

Even as spacious as the mysterious realm was, in my dreams or otherwise, the fog crept along my body forcing me to fight the claustrophobic feeling, nonetheless. And I was no stranger to claustrophobia and it's crushing claws and suffocating presence.

But tight spaces aside, it wasn't the pitch blackness or the unnerving silence of the realm that prevented me from wanted to return, it was the fear of seeing him. Nolan didn't have a chance to escape that hell, unlike me he had no body to come back to. He would be forever trapped there. Who's to say he wouldn't use his time to wait for another chance to trap what remained of my soul.

Who knew how long he'd try to anchor me down and pull me back into his embrace.

Yet, in my nightmares, time seemed to slip me back into the place I wished not to go. And every time I'm there, confusion and fear overtake me and all I do is run. Run and search for a pinprick of light to steer me back to the physical state and back to the safety of mom's house.

Only when I'm dreaming do I convince myself that a shadow of me had been trapped in the astral plane. And the Rhea who was trapped ran and searched for the sliver of what was left of my soul I had abandoned there.

The thought sent a chill through me, even though it was only a fear.

I had yet to encounter Nolan in my nightmares, but the anticipation of him appearing at any moment to ambush me and pin me down was enough to put my senses on high alert. That anxiety, stress, and the unknown was already nightmarish.

Upon awakening, I would always question myself and my sanity. I shake the unease only after reminding myself I had just woken up from a dream even though that place is more real than real.

He's still there. I know because I have seen him when he joins me in my reflection. Haunting me just like the other Rhea had. But he's not reaching out to me for help or assistance, his aim is to pull me back in his embrace, and he would never give up. In life, he was the kind of guy who always went after what he wanted and very seldomly failed at acquiring it. Would he be the same in death?

Still, he was there. Still, he was with me. I would see him over my shoulder whenever I caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror, a window, or even a stagnant puddle of water. He watched me, remaining a short distance behind me, glaring at me through the reflection with such vile in his murky eyes.

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