Dying Stars

Chapter XVII

RYUJIN

I can't imagine how far our thing is going now. The thing between Yeji and I.

When Yujin holds my hand and brought me to the park, that is the day I realized how much I like Yeji, I like her as someone I want to have a life with.

But I don't know how Yeji takes me in her life, Am I just her thing to enjoy when she's bored? Or Am I just someone she can lean on?

Or I just let her feel that she's not a lonely person in this bedroom?

Yujin keeps on talking a lot with me while we're walking at the park and in every steps we make, Yeji is the only person I can imagine I'm walking with.

I'm imagining Yeji walking besides me without anything on her face that will hide her beauty.

A moment where she's not scared to face other people anymore.

For the whole day I'm with Yujin, I barely talk to her, I'm always spacing out, I can't focus on her, all I want to happen is to go home and be with Yeji.

Before we go home, Yujin brought me to her Dad's restaurant and in that moment, because of loving Yeji, I forgot that I am already hurting Yujin.

I'm standing in the window and watching the Sun goes down. Yujin stand next to me, "You really don't like me." She said.

I shake my hand and smiled at her, "That's not it--I do like you but," She cut me off "As a Friend." She said in her low voice like she's stopping herself from crying.

I didn't talk.

"Is it wrong if I still keep on liking you even though I was rejected twice?" Her hope.

"It's not wrong with me but how about you?" I said.

"If I asked you for the 3rd time and you still say 'No', I think i'll stop."

"Where are you getting that patience? Yujin... you should've feel bad about yourself but why are still giving yourself a feel of hope?"

She smiled at me. "I once lost hope to my Mom and I regret it every other day and night. So, I don't want it to happen again."

"Why do you like me so much?" I genuinely asked.

She smiled at me like she was so happy she heard asked that question, "I don't know too, I just like you. I know you're kind and the way you smiled at me every morning we walk together, I thought you're cute and real." The way she answered with confidence.

"Do you like someone now? Ryujin?"

I nodded at her.

The food suddenly came and Yujin remains civil to me, she doesn't let her emotion get in the way. She's different.

When we're already walking on the way to our bedrooms, I watched Yujin entered her room and I feel nervous to get inside the bedroom, nothing is different between us but there's something different with me, in every interaction I make with, there's a meaning to me.

I went inside and tried my best to talk to her, I want no body interaction with her.

Patrick called that he will go to the big Christmas tree in the park so I came with Yeji and I found out that they have a job tomorrow.

I told Yeji that I will come with her.

When we're already at the University, she said she's going somewhere, I think this is a chance for me to sleep earlier on my bed, I can't let myself sleep next to her anymore, I like her.

Yeji is still not coming back for almost an hour, I tried to sleep but I can't, I'm worrying about her, she's still not home.

After a while, someone was opening the door then I lie down so fast acting like I'm already asleep. I can hear Yeji changing her clothes and I'm feeling nervous.