To heal is to feel

The shot

"Are you okay? You look kinda pale. You were sitting out there for a awhile." I hear Carl say from besides me, I look behind me at rick and Shane to see if they were listening. They were not so I looked back at Carl and shook my head

"I'm fine Carl." I say as I wipe the dripping sweat from my forehead for the fifth time.

I had to keep my focus on Sophia and bringing her to her momma, it was the only thing that mattered right now.

I slowed down my walking and so did Carl but I didn't pay much attention to that. Rick walked in front of us and Shane stayed behind me and Carl.

I froze when a branch snapped and then some more, rick held his hand out and everyone else stopped. I helped my knife closely to my side as I follow quietly behind rick when he started to move.

I started to prepare for what was to come, whether it be a human attack or walker attack I was ready. I think.

I saw the color brown on something moving in front of us and tried to squint my eyes to see more but the trees were blocking me.

Next I saw a pair of antlers and knew it couldn't be human so I dropped my stiff stance and followed the others that were still walking with caution

It was just a animal. I wanted to know more touch and walked ahead of rick before he put an arm around my shoulders

"Lanna." He warned quietly down at me to not sook whatever it was. I was about to hiss back at him with words when the animal came out

My eyes zeros in on it, a deer, and a smile couldn't help but birth onto my lips. I love deers. Before rick could drop his arm i wriggled out of it and took slowly steps towards it.

I flinched back a little when I felt a hand tap on my shoulder, but it was just Carl so I gave him a reassuring smile and took his hand in mine.

I lead us steadily towards the deer and when we were close, close enough to hear its breathing from away I reached my hand out and Carl did the same by my side.

We were so close to grazing our fingers over the deers slimy nose when something happened. Something horrible.

It happened before I heart it, if that makes since. Carls tight grip on my hand quickly went away and was replaced with nothing but the wind, I saw the deers head land in front of my frozen feet as the rest of its body fell limp quickly.

Rick and Shane's faces are something resembling fear, panic,maybe anger.

There's was blood coming out of carls stomach and the deers. Pool of blood under both bodies and that's when I registered the sound I heard moments ago. It was the sound of a shotgun going off.

Carl was shot. The deers dead.

"Oh shit." I repeated the words as I ran side by side with rick. Shane was behind us with the man that shot Carl and the deer.

I didn't care that my legs and lungs were burning or that my head was drenched in sweet and the faded feeling worsened. What mattered now was carls well being and I was going to make sure he was going to be okay.

I picked up my head to see that we were coming closer to a big White House. It looked friendly but then the door was slammed open and a old man with others besides him came out but I didn't care to look.

"Was he bit?" The old man said, I shook my head

"Shot by your man." Rick said. His voice giving away the sadness and panic he was feeling right now.

"Otis?" A old blonde lady said but I didn't care who she was talking about

"He said find Hershel. Is that you?" Rick asked and Hershel nodded

"Help me. Help my boy." Rick pleaded

"Get him inside."

The others turned and ran back into the house but I- I couldn't do it anymore and rested my hands on my knees as i panted heavily at the dirt below me.

Damn. I felt everything now but tried not to by shaking my head as if to rid the feelings coming up like I used to when mom would do hurtful things to me.

I heard Shane's voice from behind me still a far and I stood up straight, letting ong out a few breaths before running up the stairs and flaying the door open and running towards the room that I heard Ricks pleads from.

Just when I enter the door with one hand on the door to keep my balance and the other nervously picking at its own fingers sling, I see Rick shakily holding a pillow case to Carl bloody wound while the old man holds some weird looking thing to carls heart

I follow his hands because these people might be helping us now but they are still strangers.

"I got a heart beat. It's faint." Hershel says , the blonde lady from before comes up behind rick and I step forward, cautiously.

"I got it step back." The blonde lady says and rick steps back. I don't think he's noticed me in the room yet but I don't blame him. I think his son lying asleep on a bloody bed has something to do with that.

"Maggie, I.v." Hershel says and a brunette young looking lady gives him some straw looking things

"We need some space." The brunette lady says

"Your name?" Hershel yells out

"Rick. I-I'm rick." Rick stutters out

"Rick, we're gonna do everything we can, okay?" You need to give us some room. Now." Hershel says and I walk around the bed to Rick and grab him by the arm

He flinches and I remove my hand immediately, he looks down at me for a couple of seconds before I reach my hand out again for his hand, waiting.

I know the type of state he is in and I also now that he isn't thinking straight, so I didn't want to trigger him. Momma always came me coke to help with shock after something like a bad accident happened to me.

But I don't have coke to give to rick, only my hands.

Rick takes my hand in his when I hear Shane's voice from outside of the window. Rick is moving out of the room with me by him seeing as he was practically dragging my by the hand.

He wasn't hurting me with his grip but wasn't gentle either.

Rick opens the front door with one shaky hand and I help him by opening it with my other hand. Shane stops at the bottom of the steps and looks between me and rick with heavy breaths and wild eyes.