SACRIFICE ³ - DEAN WINCHESTER

Dear Dad

I know this isn't how you wanted something like this to end.

I'm sorry that I gave up my soul. I'm sorry I died without truly saying goodbye. I wish I could have. And I'm sorry that I couldn't tell you what I did..

When you knocked on my door that night, I really didn't know what to think. Nate wasn't even home when you showed up. You told me once that you never wanted kids because you were afraid you'd turn out to be like your dad. And yet, you were a better father than my own.

Sure, you taught me that the monsters under my bed were real and that the demons in my closet could possess me, but you also taught me how to protect myself. You taught me everything I know.

I guess I didn't fully learn how to protect the people I love because I'll still end hurt them in the long run. But, it's part of life and death. You can't always protect your friends emotionally and physically.

Writing this, I remember one of the talks we once had that made me look at you differently. When I ran away after an argument I can't even remember. After you found me, you told me that, no matter what choices I made, or the arguments we would have, you would never be disappointed in me. You'd never leave me behind. You'd always be there to protect me. I guess you can't always protect the people you love most.

Are you disappointed in the choice I made? I'm sorry if you are.

I didn't want to die like a Hunter. Yeah, I wanted to go out in a big blaze of glory, but death by hellhound sounds a lot like me telling people I died from an evil Scooby-Doo. Cujo, maybe.

Can you make sure I'm buried? If I die like a Hunter, at least give me a normal funeral. With magnolia flowers. And a sad song.

Onto a cheerier note, I just want to thank you. Thank you, truly, from the deepest and grossest part of my heart, for saving me. Thank you for taking me in even when you didn't want to, and thank you for keeping up with me over the last two decades. And thank you for being my dad.

Please take care of yourself, Bobby. Jenny-Bug