liz truss x priti patel: the complete story

23. February-March 2022

"You won't get away with it." Boris' Head of Policy warned him with pleading eyes, as they went over his statement on the Sue Gray report. "It's a serious issue, you can't use it for political point scoring." 

"Don't be silly. I mean, it's a common misconception. I'll just say I didn't know better if they call me out." Boris said.

"You're already under suspicion for misleading parliament. You don't want to do it again." 

"Have you seen the state of this party!" Boris erupted. "This is the best way to turn the public against Labour. I'm saying it whether you like it or not." He said defiantly, and his advisors sighed.

"Well don't say I didn't warn you." She said scornfully, and left the room. 

"Just- add something to cover you. Some kind of caveat that its your opinion." A remaining advisor warned.

"Alright, alright." Boris said, adding a line to his response before heading to the Commons. 

*

After the statement, Starmer stood, his voice slow and sombre and his language strangely religious in an appeal to the Tory backbenches. 

"They know better than anyone that he is unsuitable for office. Many of them knew in their hearts that we would inevitably come to this one day. And they know that continuing his leadership will mean further misconduct, coverup and deceit. It is only they who can end this farce. The eyes of the country are upon them. They will be judged by the decisions they take now."

Boris stood, his raucous tone a stark contrast to his opponent.

"There's a reason why he has said nothing about the report. That is because the report does absolutely nothing to substantiate the tissue of nonsense that he has just spoken – absolutely nothing. Instead, this leader of the opposition, a former Director of Public Prosecutions-" He hesitated briefly, making sure to mumble slightly as he delivered the risky blow. "-although he spent most of his time prosecuting journalists and failing to prosecute Jimmy Savile, as far as I can make out – chose to use this moment continually to prejudge a police inquiry."

The room was still, the uproar expected quieted by a great shock, as members on both sides questioned if they'd heard him right. Keir's expression was indignant, but behind his fury was a great terror, that everyone would believe the Prime Minister's lies.

*

The following day, he saw that his attempt had completely backfired. The Speaker and his backbenchers alike expressed disapproval at his words, and called for him to apologise. Even his own cabinet couldn't defend him, as Raab admitted the Prime Minister's claims were completely unsubstantiated. 

Boris sighed. He was disappointed, of course, but he hadn't failed completely. His audience wasn't the party, but the public, and as he scrolled through a Facebook comment section on the video, he saw its viewers believed him completely. 

But then, a letter appeared on his desk, and he immediately knew it was his first resignation. Probably some junior minister who no one had heard of, wouldn't even break the news, he thought. But as began to read, he saw the signature of Munira Mirza, his Head of Policy who'd worked with him for 14 years.

'I believe it was wrong for you to imply this week that Keir Starmer was personally responsible for allowing Jimmy Saville to escape justice. There was no fair or reasonable basis for that assertion. This was not the normal cut-and-thrust of politics; it was an inappropriate and partisan reference to a horrendous case of child sex abuse. You tried to clarify your position today but, despite my urging, you did not apologise for the misleading impression you gave.'