(POV)
"Hey... Hello.. "
Yeah..i finally couraged up & said that to the guy i am watching on from last two months.
Everyday when i leave for my high school, the guy exactly stands there, on the same spot, looking down on his book & not looking anywhere, to catch on the bus..
We catch on two different bus.. So i can look at him only for couple of minutes...
You might be wondering why looking at him is that much important..
Well... It's important for me... Because recently i have realized, i don't feel any attraction towards any girl, like people at my age does... Nor like i feel attraction towards any guy either...
This fatal disease has hover on me... & the reason is " that guy".
I only, truly am being attracted towards that guy...you can call me silly... But that's what is happening to me..
Every day i have to wake super early at morning.. Even if i am not a morning person.. & my school starts at afternoon.. Still.. I manage to get up at morning just to run to the bus stop...then after watching him going away, i go to my school almost three hours early... Even my mom thinks i am changing for good..
My friends thinks i got a girlfriend for myself... I do.. Not a girlfriend, but a boyfriend.. & that's totally in my imagination..
In my imagination... He doesn't go away in another bus in the morning.. He changes his bus & hops on mine.. The whole way to school, he keeps standing with me in the bus holding on me with one hand & grabbing on the hand grip, so that i don't fall down... Because i usually fall on the middle aged woman, whom i don't know at all.. But coincidentally everyday sits just before the place i am standing on inside the bus... She gives away a really scary stare after i fall on her... Sorry eomma..
In my imagination, he will wait for me after my school too.. He holds my hand.. & take me to eat something sweet.. I like sweet things a lot.. & everyone says i have a sweet tooth.. Which i don't get at all... I tried to taste my tooth with my tongue.. But it doesn't taste sweet at all... I don't get what people says at all..
In my imagination, on weekends, i go to dates with him.. Only he & me.. He takes me to watch movies.. Or amusing park.. Even Disney Land... Which is quite impossible.. It's really far from where we live.. & that's really expensive.. I don't even have the money to buy my favorite comics.. Because i spent that on buying video games a few days ago.. & mom gonna beat my ass if i tell her to raise my pocket money... & she can even throw me out of home if i do so... I don't think anyone will hire me even as a cleaner.. Because i don't literally like to do anything... Sorry for being born as a lazy adorable guy... I couldn't help it..
So going on Disneyland will be a risky decision...
Again.. In my imagination.. I do a lot of things with that guy.. Which i can't really tell you.. You will find me as a pervert.. Which i really am not (?)... But..
In reality...he never even have a glimpse at me... This is frustrating.. Really really frustrating..
I sometimes feel like go n slap on his head to force him & look at me... But he will get scared of me if i do so.. Because my friends says me slap hurts.... I don't really get why they say so.. Their skin just gets red & my finger prints on them if i slap them.. I literally don't get why.. I think their skin is just sensitive.. There's something wrong with them..
But not being able to talk to that person makes me so sad...depressed..In my depression.. I just rarely kicked on my best friend's leg... He just overreacted.. He went to the hospital... & i don't know if the doctor got his certificate by cheating on something.. He said my friend has a fracture... & plastered his leg...overdramatic people..
