When All is Lost

Chapter 26

For me, I needed to put it in a small box. I tied that box up with a string of yarn and put it on a shelf far in the back of my mind. Someday, when things were better, I could take it off that shelf, dust it clean, and reexamine it – maybe even process it. Today was not that day.

It also couldn't be that day for the grieving woman on the floor.

As much as I deeply sympathized with her, I knew that she needed to pull herself together fast if she wanted to make it. It wasn't just her life on the line but the boy's life as well, and he was about to wake up to a world of pain. He needed her.

She has to bury it.

It wasn't something I could ask. There was no fair way to go about it. The best I could do was guide her to it. Ray had drawn a picture. I had buried a watch. The importance of something symbolic – a ritual – was not lost on me. Misty and Jamie would need something too and I would help them if I could.

I bent down slightly, keeping my voice a whisper. "Misty, right? Mind if I join you?"

Misty must have not even realized I'd joined her as she jumped so hard that one of her feet skidded out a bit. She hurriedly wiped her face before pulling her glasses out of her pocket and putting them on.

"Sorry," I apologized, almost regretting disturbing her.

If only we had the luxury of time.

"May I?" I asked again, indicating to the floor beside her.

She took me in for a moment before nodding. "Sure," she said, keeping her voice down as well as she wiped her nose on her sleeve.

I lowered myself down and sat only about a foot apart from her, leaning against the wall as I followed her position and hugged my knees to my chest. It was trickier for me to do with my backpack still on and I needed to remove my gun from my waistband and put it on my lap, but I eventually found a comfortable position. If Misty had noticed my fidgeting, she didn't let on. Her eyes had become locked on the counter in front of us.

"I'm sorry for your loss." I genuinely was. Her pain was raw and real and deeply uncomfortable to witness. Even in the faded grey light, I could see her lips quiver as a few stray tears escaped. "Do you want to talk about it?"

She gave me half a shrug, barely more than a shoulder twitch. I could tell she was trying to reel her emotions in and I admired her for it.

"Want to tell me about her?

Misty let out something between a laugh and a sob before she could stifle it. Her tears flowed freely again but a small smile snuck into the corners of her lips. "She was..." She had to pause to sniffle. "She was the most infuriating woman I have ever met."

I couldn't help but let out a small sound of surprise. That was not the answer I had expected. However, the sound I'd made caused Misty to glance my way, and her smile grew as she looked back towards the counter.

"She was so stubborn. She had the worst temper over the stupidest things. She once got mad because she messed up the ratio of mixing different kinds of salts together. Salts! But, she was like that, you know? She was always so hard on herself over nothing – a real perfectionist.

"She hated waking up early in the morning. I had to drag her out of bed on the weekends. I always had to make breakfast. She couldn't cook for anything, but she was the pickiest eater. She always needed to eat with utensils, too. She even ate her pizza with a knife and fork. I couldn't stand it. She always knew how to get just under my skin. She could annoy me like no one else. But God, I loved her. I loved her so, so much."

Misty broke after her schpiel. Sobs wracked her small frame as she curled in on herself, not even bothering to take her glasses off.

I scooted closer to her and put an arm around her shoulder. She cried and cried. She cried until her tears were spent and all that was left were small hiccups. I stayed quiet, waiting to see what she would need.