Girl talks

Anonymous Letter

This chapter goes to Bee cause she's a strong woman, an old friend, an uplifter, and the maker of all my awesome, awesome covers. She's Beth.

I love you Bee. x

Soundtrack: it will rain, Bruno Mars

I let my eyes quickly dart around the street. No one seems to notice the girl standing, hidden in the crowd;almost drowning in the sands of persons.

I slip my left hand into my tattered pocket and bring out the neatly folded paper. I allow the first tear to drop on the paper as I let go of it. It floats in the air until it collides with the hard concrete floor. I made sure to boldly scribble please read on both sides of the paper. I steal a glance again to make sure that no one has seen me.

My tears are flowing, silent endless lakes of salty water. My vision is blurry. I hit a woman as I struggle to get out of there. She sighs and curses under her breath. I stumble into a restaurant almost out of breath.

I flop down on an empty seat.

I wait to see if someone will notice my letter. I want to see if the little words will unfold to thoughts of human.

Twelve minutes gone.

I'm shaking uncontrollably. I'm also aware of the dagger eyes that are tearing my soul out. I'm aware of the piteous eyes looking my way. I'm aware of all these but they don't matter at all. It's too late for that. Too too late.

A man notices the paper. I sense a spark of hope. He's been looking down when he noticed the paper. He must have a perfect eyesight. I forget to breathe while waiting for his next move. My eyes squeeze shut in a silent prayer of faith and hope. The man is dressed in a simple suit. It's neatly ironed but I know it's not an expensive one. He's holding a bag that seems to be holding a laptop. The man looks around and deliberately steps over the paper. A chuckle escapes from my lips before I can even stop it.

I'm thinking, maybe he can understand, maybe he can put himself in another shoe. I remember to breathe and choke on my breath. My neck is aching from stretching it. I have to stretch it so I can see his reaction, the expression on his face. Can this man be any different?

Silence.

He bends and picks the letter from the ground. The man exhales deeply and unfolds the paper in a swift movement. For the first time in days, I try to catch my tears as they escape. I'm too slow, they race down my face in their own competition. It's okay.

I forget to breathe again.

He is reading it, the man is reading my letter. His face is solemn, very serious. I find myself regretting what I've just done but I push the thoughts to the back of my head. What's on his mind?

I read the letter again in my mind. I can do this because I know the words. I know the sentences of the letter. I can almost sing them. In my heart, I start reading my letter again as soon as I see his eyes read the first line.

To whom may read,

I'm a girl, a lonely girl

I'm dying, My soul is dying

It's loosing to the ills of this world

To the stains of the earth

To whom may read,

I'm a girl, a lost sad girl

I have love but lack love

I have happiness but lack laughter