Cowboys & Angels

Twenty Five

Come on, relax your mind on me
When you need a shoulder, you can cry
on me
Baby you can bet your life on me
Put it all on me
You got my number you can call on me
If you're in trouble, put the fault on me
When you're mad, you can take it out on
me
When it don't add up, you can count on me
When you're low, come get high on me
Make it slow, take your time on me
Settle in, let it out, come and lay on me
When it gets heavy, put the weight on me
Baby, put it all on me

All On Me x Devin Dawson

Beckham

In about 20 minutes, I'm sure I'll be thankful for epidurals.  Right now, though?  Not so much.  I'm currently leaned over the side of my bed, pillow wrapped tightly in my arms, and a death grip on Jake's hands as he's crouched in front of me while a doctor squeezes a 4 inch needle into a tiny space in my spine.   I hear the sound of the needle being removed from its sterile package and the doctor lets me know he's about to place it. 

"Alright, mama.  I've been told you're a nurse, so would you prefer for me to just knock this out quickly or do you want me to talk you through the steps?" He asks, and I greatly appreciate his consideration.

"If you wouldn't mind talking me through the steps, that would be awesome.  I'm a slight control freak so that helps a little," I reply.

"A little is the understatement of the year, short stack," Jake teases and I stick my tongue out at him with grin. 

"Alright, Beckham.  I'm cleaning the site now, it'll be a little wet and chilly.  Next is the local anesthetic, here comes a little pinch.  Ok, let's give that a second to numb up."  He lets it sit for a second before he starts in on Jake. 

"Dad, you're probably gonna wanna keep your eyes far away from what I'm doing.  I've seen maybe a handful of dads that have watched without passing out, and I'm sure you've already gotten the nurse's speech about how you are not the priority here, yes?" The doctor asks and Jake nods.  "Good, because if you hit the floor, you'll stay there until we're all done with your wife.  Understand?"  Jake nods again, wide eyed. 

"Here comes the good part, you'll feel some pressure as I insert the needle and push the medicine."

He definitely wasn't lying and I feel like someone is shoving their thumb in between my vertebrae and pinching.  I look to Jake and he's just a shade shy of green and his eyes are as big as saucers.

"You looked, didn't you?" I ask, a smile slipping across my face.

"It was an accident, I swear.  But I'm fine!  Definitely not gonna pass out.  You ok, darlin'?"

"Good question, dad.  How you doing down there mama?" The doctor asks.  "Thumbs up if you're good, down if you need a second."

I stick my thumb up in response, knowing I need to stay as still as possible since he's literally playing with my spine. 

"I'm pulling the needle out now, leaving the catheter in place.   You're all done!  I have you on a pump, so you'll just push that little button any time you need a little extra pain relief.  You can push it as many times as you want, but you'll only get a dose once every 30 minutes.  You don't have to dose every 30 minutes, but it won't provide you medicine a second before 30 minutes since the last push.  Let your nurse know if you have any dizziness, headaches, nausea, or difficulty breathing.  Do either of you have any questions before I let you rest?" He asks. 

"Nope, I'm good.  If I do think of anything, I'll just pester my nurse.  Thank you so much," I tell him, already feeling a little relief.

"My pleasure, congrats you two!" The doctor chirps then heads out the door.  Between the pain relief, exhaustion, and adrenaline crash, I'm about 3 seconds from falling asleep.