"Where the hell have you been??" Victoria hisses, her and Peter jumping up from the couch as the three kids exit the elevator.
"It's almost midnight! And Ben, how'd you even get here? You live like, half an hour away."
"I flew."
"Don't sass me. I'm tired."
Vicky sighs, rubbing her face and pulling out her phone.
"Whatever. I'll tell your parents you're here. You can stay the night."
. . .
Jayce, Rose and Ben are sprawled about on the couches, phones in hand as they text each other to avoid being heard.
Why do two ten year olds and a nine year old have cellphones you ask?
Because Victoria feels it's necessary, and Tony put Peter in his will back in 2018, then didn't have the heart to take him out when he thought the kid died.
Meaning Peter inherited half of the money, the other half going to Pepper.
[The Three Stab-a-teers group chat]
El Stabby 1
So we gonna talk about Mr fancy kidnapper?
El Stabby 2
Obviously
He touched me
If I see him again I'm cutting off his fingers and feeding them to him
El Stabby 1
Not if I do it first
El Stabby 3
Help
I forgot who is who
Why do we all have practically the same name???
El Stabby 2
I'm chimkin numgets
El Stabby 1
And I'm Sir Baconstan the IV
El Stabby 3
Oh right
Here I'm just gonna change your names
[El Stabby 3 changed El Stabby 1 to Sir Baconstan the IV]
[El Stabby 3 changed El Stabby 2 to Chimkin Numgets]
Chimkin Numgets
Well now El Stabby 3 doesn't make sense
[Chimkin Numgets changed El Stabby 3 to Burmger King]
Burmger King
Why
Sir Baconstan the IV
UM BECAUSE IT'S FUNNY
Chimkin Numgets
MEAHAHAHA
Burmger King
GUYS
THE WEIRD FANCY DUDE
Sir Baconstan the IV
Oh yeah
We should definitely stab him
Chimkin Numgets
Absolutely yes
Burmger King
Are you gonna ask your mom who Siggeir is?
I know he was weird and creepy as heck
But maybe what he was saying was true
Chimkin Numgets
I hope not
Also, if we tell mom she won't let us leave the house anymore :(
Maybe we should deal with this ourselves?
Burmger King
That never ends well in the movies
Chimkin Numgets
Right
How about we just check it out first
That way, we can be sure he's a threat, and not just some weirdo who hates our mom
Sir Baconstan the IV
Right
Like some anti-hero
If he's bad news
We get an adult :)
Burmger King
Okay
As SOON as things get bad
We get our parents
Also, I still hate this name
Sir Baconstan the IV
And we don't
Chimkin Numgets
>:)
. . .
A/N:
El Stabby 1/Sir Baconstan the IV is Jayce
El Stabby 2/Chimkin Numgets is Rose
El Stabby 3/Burmger King is Ben
Do not ask why those are the names. I do not know. They're random as hell and I have a really weird sense of humor.
Aight hope y'all liked this chapter and I'm sorry for not posting in forever :)
Larb u 3,000 <333
-𓅿
YOU ARE READING
I Cᴀɴ'ᴛ Bᴇ ᴀ Mᴏᴍ: Aᴠᴇɴɢᴇʀs Wʀᴏɴɢ Nᴜᴍʙᴇʀ(Sᴇǫᴜᴇʟ)
FanfictionVictoria Grace is an unofficial member of the Avengers, living in the tower now that she's entered adulthood and needs to move somewhere. Many events happen in her sitcom-like life, including a few proposals and superhero weddings, ridiculous family...
