30. grateful

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grateful: (adjective)
1. feeling or showing an appreciation for something done or received.

It's now Friday and I've barely spoken to Bodi since yesterday morning

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It's now Friday and I've barely spoken to Bodi since yesterday morning. I have no idea if the probation officers or police officers would be waiting for him at home. If he's going to go back to prison for breaking the terms and not being home by curfew.

I pray they give him a warning. They can track where he would have been, out of trouble but in my company. If I have to give them a statement, I will. Nothing can happen to Bodi, especially after everything he told me last night.

The words that have shocked me to my core.

He hates himself, he hates lying to the world. But he's confused, he's repressed and I have no idea what I can do to make everything better.

Being at probation without him sucks, even when I was ignoring him. That eerie feeling never goes away, it's better when he's here with me because I feel safer. Today nothing feels safe.

I'm sick with guilt because what if something happens to him? Maybe I should have taken him home so he doesn't risk being locked up. Made an example out of.

My hand tucks into my pocket and I glance at my phone, still no messages. He hasn't replied to any, he hasn't even seen them. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. He could be sorting things out with his father or having back to back meetings about breaking his probation.

All I want to know is that he's okay. But I cannot get rid of this nausea inside my stomach. I sweep the floor but I'm not even looking at what I'm sweeping, I am completely distracted by him and what could be.

The thought of not seeing him for a while sends shivers down my spine.

Or is that the manor?

I don't even fucking know anymore. My head is at a complete crossroads.

There is a gentle breeze against my neck and I whip my head around, clapping a hand across my skin in retaliation. Goosebumps raise across my body, in every crevice until I drop the broom. A loud bang echoes across the walls from the sound and I turn from the room, walking to the front of the house.

I take one step around the corner of the hall and slam into a hard body. At first I want to scream because my worst nightmare has come true, but when I look up into those warm and welcoming brown eyes I collapse into his arms all together.

"Bodi," I exhale sharply.

"Hey," he's a little out of breath. I wrap my arms around him and pull his body into my chest. His hands wind around my back and I smother my face into his shoulder.

"I've been worried sick about you," I mumble into his jumper.

Bodi gives me one squeeze and pulls back, holding my face between his warm palms. "I'm sorry, I've had a hectic day. I didn't mean to not text you."

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