Stray Gods (SLOW UPDATES BUT NOT ABANDONED)

Chapter 8

'Embarrassing?' Felix said, his tone surprised. 'What could you possibly be embarrassed about with us?' he wondered aloud.

Suddenly, you thought of something. Something you had thought of too yesterday. You looked up at him eagerly, hoping, no, begging he would be able to give you something, anything, that would help it all make sense to you. Ignoring the once again creeping feeling of fluttering in your stomach, you spoke quickly.

'Lix, you know a lot about animals,' you said. You didn't wait for an answer as it was not a real question. 'You're a vet, you know,' you added. Felix was raising his brow again at your way of talking. 'There are animals, right? Animals who have some sort of... some kind of...' you were searching for a word that wouldn't make you blush, but as they didn't seem to come, you decided to throw all care to the wind and spit it out anyway as you knew you hadn't much time until the feeling would overtake you. 'There are animals who go in some sort of rut, right? A heat, a mating cycle or something?' you said, feeling your cheeks heat up.

'Yes...' Felix said slowly, clearly having no clue where your question was going or why you were asking it.

'What kind of animals have that?' you asked eagerly.

'Well, almost all animals have mating cycles. I mean, they don't fall in love as humans do,' Felix said, frowning.

'Nevermind,' you said quickly. The way Felix was scrunching his nose as he was thinking distracted you and the fluttering became worse.

You took a deep breath, leaving behind all sense and asking the question that had lingered in your mind since yesterday.

'Am I an animal?' you asked, carelessly. For a moment Felix looked at you perplexed, then he started laughing. High at first, before pitching down to his usual noticeably low tone.

'You are, when you're fighting Hyunjin for the last chocolate bar, but besides that, I'd say no,' he chortled.

Although he seemed to find the question hilarious, you felt defeated. It had been your last hope. Your last logical illogical explanation of why whatever was happening was happening.

Apparently, your disdain was visible on your face because Felix quickly stopped laughing and straightened his face.

'Why did you ask?' he asked, trying to sound serious. You looked at his beautiful face. The freckles on it were like the constellations you had seen last night in the sky.

'Because something is wrong with me,' you said absentmindedly as your eyes darted from his eyes to his lips and back again.

Felix's face got really serious now. 'Wrong? What's wrong with you?' he repeated your words.

His dark eyebrows knitted together.

'Whenever I'm... close to someone,' you decided, 'I-I... I feel the need to... to kiss them,' you admitted. Although the truth, it was only half a truth. You didn't dare say it only happened around them. You weren't sure if Felix would be able to call you out on it, but you prayed he wouldn't.

'Oh,' he said. His face looked stunned, eyebrows slightly raised and lips parted.

You bit your lip and quickly looked away from him.

'It's like an itch I can't scratch,' you said, squeezing your eyes shut, trying to block the image of his cute little nose, his long dark lashes and his doll-like pink lips out of your mind. 'It's driving me insane,' you admitted. Your words were almost a cry.

Felix was silent for a moment. Your heart was pounding in your chest and the urge to open your eyes and face him was so tempting...

'Do you have it now?' Felix asked. His voice was almost a whisper and lower than before.