𝙸 𝙲𝚊𝚗'𝚝 𝙲𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚘𝚗𝚜

𝚂𝟸𝙴𝟷𝟹: 𝙿𝚒𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚜 𝚃𝚞𝚛𝚗𝚜 𝙸𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝙿𝚒𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚜

Frank checks his watch. "Only eight hours since this morning. Oh, I'm so screwed for my psych final..."

"How can you think about psychology at a time like this?" Annabeth asks.

Frank pulls his mask up higher, but it doesn't hide the tears he's desperately trying to hold back. "It... The other stuff helps to take my mind off of it. Off of her."

Percy sets his pinch pot in the sink and freshens up his fake Kraken tattoo with a Sharpie. "I meant... How long has it been since Hazel went missing?"

✎✎✎

The day starts like any other end-of-the-school-year barbecue at New Rome—bad.

Piper's first mistake—or so she thought at the time—was getting her hopes up. Only she would get excited over a pirate-themed event. Everyone loves pirates. Pirates of The Caribbean was Piper's bisexual awakening.

So two corsets, a pair of fishnets, some thigh-high boots, bandanas, a tricorner hat, a shit-ton of makeup, and one very pissed-off Annabeth later, Piper and her radical feminist friend are ready to go to town on some free ribs. One of them is excited to show her costume off to a certain clueless blond, and the other is ranting about the impracticalities of fishnet tights. Guess which is which.

It doesn't take long for Piper and Annabeth to find the guys. It also doesn't take long for them to spot Dean D. Piper admires his boldness. Only at New Rome Community College can the dean get away with dressing in drag at a school-sanctioned event. This time, he's supposed to be a tacky eighties aerobics teacher... oh, like Olivia Newton-John in the "Physical" music video, which Piper only knows because her mother used to work out to it. Piper absolutely does not listen to that song through her headphones at the gym, only to then lie and tell Annabeth that she's listening to, "uh, the Doobie Brothers," which—let's be honest—isn't that much better.

"Why are you brats all dressed as pirates?" Dean D asks.

Percy pushes his eyepatch onto his forehead. "Because of the pirate theme? You put it on the invitation."

"I did no such thing!"

Mr. Brunner steers his electric wheelchair to the edge of the stage and shows Dean D an image on his iPad.

"I see..." Dean D says. "Venus!"

"Yes, Dean?" asks Ms. Venus, who Piper thought was New Rome's public relations manager or something.

"Cancel the pilates teacher I hired! Now, please!"

"Woah," says Leo. "Can you imagine if we pronounced 'pirates' like 'pilates?'"

Evidently, everyone can imagine it because they all have to try it out. That's six ADHD kids and Frank for you though!

Maybe they should be focusing on the fact that Dean D thought pilates at a college barbecue was a good idea, but Piper digresses. The point here is that by some mistake, about a hundred or so college students are gathered on the quad dressed like pirates.

Dean D rolls his eyes at the surprised murmurs among these hundred or so college students and passes a bullhorn to Mr. Brunner, the campus activities director.

"Hello, all!" he says. "We know all of you have been working incredibly hard studying for finals, writing papers, and completing projects, so to give you a hard-earned break, the Office of Campus Activities and I have put together a game. Back by popular demand... it's paintball assassins capture the flag!"

"Back by popular demand?" Annabeth asks. "Who the hell demanded this?"

Leo wrings his hands. "You know I love making things go boom, but even I still have nightmares from last time..."