The Alpha Belongs With Me?

37

Jake had dark hair and blue eyes. My dimples. It was like the way I pictured it in my head, except for the fact, we were in his room, not the hospital. He was 7 pounds and 8 ounces. Perfect baby.

I woke up the next morning to see Bryan sleeping. Jake was placed in a little crib by my hospital bed. He was so cute sleeping. Just like in my thoughts. Bryan woke up almost instantly. I smiled at him and looked back at Jake. Bryan got up and looked at him, I saw a smile grow on his face.

"He's so, so perfect." Bryan said.

"Let's go home."

"You sure he's ready?"

"I think he is. We'll wait for him to wake up, and then we'll ask him. If he smiles, we'll go. If he does nothing, we'll stay a little longer."

"Sounds like a plan."

We were waiting for Jake to wake up, I sat up looking around and Bryan was playing a game on his phone. Mine was at home. Jake woke up and Bryan picked him up. Bryan handed him to me.

"What do you think Jake? You want to go him?" I asked him.

He smiled.

"Okay, I guess we're going home." Bryan laughed.

Bryan grabbed my hospital bag and I got out of bed, I had Jake in my arms. I stopped at his little crib and dressed him in his "home from the hospital" outfit. He looked so cute in it. We stopped at the girl and she checked us out. She said his birth certificate was in my hospital bag. Bryan checked and it was there. We walked out of the hospital and drove home.

"Welcome home, Jake." I said as Bryan opened the door.

"Show him around, I'll make us lunch."

"This is the living room." I gently turned myself in a circle and showed him.

"These are the stairs, when you know how to walk, you'll climb these to your room."

"This is the bathroom. Where you'll handle, your uh business. When your older."

"This is your room. Where you'll sleep. Here's your crib, your bed. Where we'll change you, and the chair right here, is where we'll gently rock you to sleep."

"This is Mommy and Daddy's room. You come to us for anything in the world."

After I showed Jake around, Bryan had already made lunch. I sat down and gave Jake his baby food. He was such an easy baby. He ate all his food quickly. Bryan took him from me and put him down in his crib. I had just finished my lunch and Bryan looked at me.

"Babe, I know he's your first baby, but you can't be holding him the whole time. He's safe in his room. The door is locked, he doesn't even have a window in his room. He's up there sleeping. He's fine." Bryan took my hand and I knew he was right.

"It's just the mommy in me. I'm new to this, I don't want to mess it up."

"And you won't. You're a great mom. We're great parents."

"I want him to have a great childhood."

"He will."

"And a lot of friends."

"He will."

"And a father and a mother he can talk to about anything."

"He does. He always will."

"I love you." Did I really change a conversation about our baby, turn into a conversation about us? 

I did.

"I love you too."

Jake started crying and I ran up the stairs. Bryan was shortly behind me. I opened Jake's door and picked him up. I walked to the changing station and laid him down. I checked his diaper and it needed to be changed. Bryan came up behind me as I was changing him. Jake was a really easy baby. He instantly stopped crying by my touch. I loved having a baby.

"Looks like we have a momma's boy." Bryan joked.

"I think we do."

"He is definitely a momma's boy. I mean, think about it. He stops crying by your touch and he looks at you and smiles. He's your boy. But, he's still mine too. And so are you." Bryan kissed me on the neck as I put a new diaper on Jake.

I picked Jake up and put him down in his crib, he picked up a toy and played with it in his little hand. I looked at him and smiled. He stood up on his little knees and I gently held his hips so he wouldn't fall. He sat back down and put his toy down. He picked up a different one. I walked towards the toy box and he started crying. 

"He doesn't want me to leave him." I thought. I heard Bryan come in.

"I walked towards the toy box, he doesn't like it when I walk from him."

"I know, babe. He's a momma's boy, you've gotta get used to it."

"I'm not sure I can."

"I know babe. Stay with him, I'll be right back."

"Hi Jake. I'm your mommy." I handed him a toy from the toy box and he didn't take it.

"You don't like the cubes? You could spell out your name, see?" I showed him the cubes and laid them on his crib mat. I took the one with a 'J' on it and stood it up so he could see it. I took the one with the 'A' and did the same, same with the 'K' and the 'E'. Jake smiled and clapped his hands. I picked him up and kissed his little, red cheek. His cheeks were so chubby. Like mine.

"You know, you look just like your daddy." I mumbled into his little ear.  Jake let out a little baby laugh. I heard Bryan come back in, he had a video camera and he was recording.

"Jake, look at the camera for Daddy." Bryan said. I turned so my back was to the camera and Jake smiled at the camera.

Jake laughed again. How could a baby be so perfect? All he had to was jump out of my arms and start walking and then he'd be legendary. I put Jake in his crib and looked at my watch. 4:30 PM.

"I think it's time for someone to take a nap." I said to Jake.

He smiled and laid down.

"It's like he already knows what you're saying," Bryan said. "It's incredible."

"I know," I started crying tears of joy. "He's already asleep."

"Well, what do you wanna do until about six-o-clock?" I looked at Bryan and he winked.

I quietly closed Jake's door and walked slowly to my bedroom.

I opened the door and saw Bryan's clothes on the floor. He was already in the bed, I undressed and got in the bed, we faced each other and stared into each others eyes. I ran my fingers up and down his chest, been a while since I had done that. He unclasped my bra from behind me. I paused my fingers on his abs. I looked back up at him. He threw my bra somewhere, I think it landed in the bathroom. He laid me on my back and climbed on top of me, he bent my legs and rested his hips in-between them. He kissed my neck and I titled my head back against the pillow. Bryan went to grab a condom and he looked at me. I shook my head 'no'.

I simply wasn't in the mood. I had just had a baby. Bryan and I stayed where we were but made out only. I looked at the clock when Bryan got up. 7:54 PM. Why hadn't Jake started crying? I threw on Bryan's baggy sweatshirt and went to Jake's room. I had to check on him.

I opened the door and Jake was sound asleep in his crib. I closed his door and went back to my room. My phone was vibrating, someone had texted me. My mom.

Mom: Bryan told me, congrats. Okay bye.

I didn't bother texting back. I had nothing to say to her. She made me lose Jake the first time. I could never forgive her. I had Jake now, and Bryan. I didn't need anyone else.

Jake's first day home went great.