Chapter Twenty-Three

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Your eyes gently fluttered open and though your head ached, you were greeted by the gentle glow of the morning sun-

Oh-

"Shit! No, no, no!" You whispered, springing to sit up as you looked around a room you most definitely did not recognize. Your forehead broke out into a sweat and you could immediately feel the tears building in your eyes.

You practically jumped from the bed, ripping your dress from the ground and trying to put it on your body as quickly as humanly possible. You tore out the bedroom to find Will making coffee in the kitchen.

His lips parted as though he was going to say something, but you were much quicker to cut him off. "Did we fuck last night?" You snapped harshly, doing everything in your power to avoid looking him in the eyes. There was a long pause before you asked again, this time louder. "Will! Did we fuck last night?" You repeated yourself.

"Ah- no? We made out a little but no- you flipped out about having a boyfriend." He scoffed, a little bit confused.

You let out a very short lived, sigh of relief.

A lump formed in your throat and you hurried to the door, grabbing your shoes and murmuring a few curse words under your breath as you walked out of the house barefoot.

You really had no idea where the fuck you were, but as silent tears streamed down your cheeks, you knew you needed to get as far away from Will as possible.

You couldn't believe yourself, you felt absolutely disgusting.

At least you didn't fuck him, that's all you had to keep telling yourself.

You couldn't call Violet- you would break down if you had to rely the nights events to someone, you couldn't go home either- you knew what you really needed to do.

You needed to go talk to Brian.

You knew this would most likely end things but you had to be honest, drawing things out would only make them worse, right?

Pulling your phone as well as a cigarette- as per usual- from your purse, you ordered an Uber whilst lighting your smoke. You felt absolutely hungover and all the coke was only making it worse, you could really use a hot shower after you crushed the person you loved most's heart.

How horrible is that?

After smoking through all of your cigarettes, you had the Uber driver drop you off at the 7-11 closest to Brian's apartment and you decided to
walk to his after getting more smokes and some Advil for your headache.

In all honesty, you drug your feet for as long as you could before finally making it up to Brian's buzzer and then again up the stairs to his apartment.

What were you supposed to say? 'Hi, don't kiss me or be happy to see me, cause I'm a terrible horrible person and I'm here to destroy our relationship.'? Were you supposed to be gentle, or just rip off the bandaid? You felt like you needed a manual for this, shit.

It seemed almost heartless, but your brain was thinking in such a logical way to avoid your own guilt- to avoid the facts of the situation -and focus on the logistics of the aftermath.

This exact thing was why you needed Brian so badly, he was your heart.

Just as you approached his door, it burst open and your boyfriends arms flew out and around your body. Your nose filled with the dark scent of cigarettes and his cologne, and the feeling of his warm, muscular frame engulfed you. You were home, and any thought of telling Brian any version of the truth flew out the door.

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