All in the Game

Chapter thirty-seven || Is it really a choice

"Come on coach it's just a few days." Arguing with coach isn't exactly what I had planned for today. However, when it's something as important as this I'll do anything to get it. "I'm sorry Nate but it's not happening." Why must he be so damn frustrating? He was like this before I became assistant coach. We always used to butt heads due to the fact that we're the same. 

Being both stubborn and determined don't always go well together. "Why?" I ask annoyed more than anything he's not caving. "Because as I've mentioned in the e-mail I sent you, the game has been moved up to this Saturday." 

What! "I–" 

"If you would read your fucking e-mails we wouldn't have this problem." My blood starts to boil and I feel like punching a hole in the wall. He's really starting to push my buttons. He moves his baseball stress ball off the desk playing with it. "Why can't I just miss this game?" His lips curve into a smile that I know can't mean anything good. 

Coach hardly ever smiles and when he does it's because he's about to give one of his many long-life lessons, and honestly, I don't have the time nor patience to listen to this right now. "This thing must be really important to you?" 

"This thing you're referring to is a remembrance party for someone back home, and it's important to Ab–to the woman I love therefore it's important to me." He squeezes the stress ball, and I can't make out what he's thinking and whether it's good or not. "Let me ask you this is your job, and team important to you?" 

Yes! They always will be. But as of right now I'd do anything to put Abby's happiness first. Coach takes my silence as an answer and speaks again. "I think you should think about your answer Nathan. And if anything else is more important to you than this, then you already have your answer." 

He moves again heading for the door. Hand on the doorknob he stops, turns, and smiles saying one last thing. "If and when you do find out that answer, and it's not your team you'd put first. Then don't show up to the game and I'll know where you stand in all of this." He tells me waving his hands around. 

Coach has a way of making a person feel bad for caring about something other than baseball. That's just the way he is, and I know deep down he has a heart.  After all he's happily married, with a daughter of his own, and grandkids. He just gets stuck in his way sometimes–ok most of the time. But what he told me in his office has stuck with me all day. 

He wants me to choose between the sport I love, and the woman I love. If I don't make the choice he expects me to make, I'm going to be fired. This is starting to feel a lot like senior year of college. I had to choose then and I have to choose now. 

Abby comes back into view after putting the boys to bed. "Ok, are you going to tell me what's wrong?" Well fuck! There's not much that can get past Abby I guess this is one of those things. "I can't make it to Val's remembrance." 

"Oh..." Her entire mood changes after that. I can tell she's upset not that I blame her I did promise. "That's ok I get it Nathan your job is more important to you." I'm taken aback. Ok, maybe she's more upset than I thought. But it's not like I planned this, besides she's the one who told me to take this job. "I just really wanted you here, and I wanted the boys to spend time with their father." 

Which I understand more than anything. "You didn't tell them I'd be there did you?" She shakes her head and relief fills me. "I didn't want them to get their hopes up." 

We end the video call shortly after that saying quick goodbyes that almost feel forced. I didn't mean to make things weird between us I just wanted to tell her the truth. This will be the third time I've hurt her. Not that I'm counting, over and over again all I ever seen to do is hurt her. 

The last time I had to pick I made the wrong decision I picked the wrong thing, and faced the consequences. But not this time if I make any mistakes, it'll be letting her go again and I refuse to do that. Grabbing my suitcase out from under my bed I get to work packing it for a few days. Even though I don't plan on staying the night it's always good to be prepared. 

I'm finished by the time Neil gets home. "Dude you'll never guess who I saw to–" he stops abruptly taking it all in my there with a suitcase in hands. "Is there something you'd like to share with me?" 

"I'm going back home for a few days." His brows raise then draw together. "I thought coach told you no?" 

"He did...but I'll be back before the game and he'll never have to know." Pushing past him with the suitcase dragging behind me, grabbing the keys to the truck I make way to the door. "Woah...woah Nathan." Neil reaches out taking hold of my arm. "Are you sure about this?" 

Nodding I say, "more than sure." 

"Then pick," he lets the words hang in the air. I expect him to say more but he doesn't. I thought that's what I'm doing picking? "You trying to make each work isn't always going to go as planned, and eventually it will hurt either the team or her, so pick and move on." 

He's right I can't keep dragging them both along. Which means as soon as I get back from this trip, I'll have to make the hardest decision of my life. But the more I think about it the more I find myself saying is it really a choice? I know what I want more than anything and I'd stop at nothing to prove to Abigail that I love her, that I choose to be with her. 

𖧷𖧷𖧷𖧷𖧷𖧷𖧷𖧷𖧷𖧷𖧷

Guys there's only a few chapters left 🥺 I'm not ready for it to be over. But at the same time I can't wait for y'all to read what comes next. 

If you're enjoying my book All in the Game. Please click the star and share your thoughts in the comments. I will update chapters every Wednesday so be on the lookout.–Morgan 💕

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