Harry Potter and the Phosphorus Rock

Chapter 6 - The Train and the Super Cool Castle

Hagrid apparently dipped after dropping Harry off at the station because he was definitely lost. His ticket said platform 9 ¾ but there was literally no station labeled as such. Why did wizards have to be such freaks? They couldn't have had a more normal and easy way of getting to their school? Harry started to think maybe Aunt Petunia had a point, but then he remembered she abused him.

"This way children! You don't want to be left behind in the MUGGLE world just because you weren't paying attention!" a woman's voice broke through the crowd. "Even though there are like 35 of you kids and we have gone through this PLATFORM NINE AND THREE QUARTERS so many times that you would know how to get through to HOGWARTS the MAGIC school (wink wink)." she turned to stare directly at Harry, then clipped through the wall.

"What in the bloody h*ll?" Harry muttered, walking over to the horde of red haired children. And I mean RED.

"Do you need help getting onto the platform?" A voice from the red amalgamation asked Harry.

"Um yeah please," Harry said, not knowing who to look at in the crowd of freckled faces. It was kind of like Star Wars: The Clone Wars.

"Just follow us! Straight into the wall!" And with that they all moved in sync straight into the wall. Weird. Harry shrugged and followed them through the wall and was amazed to find that he passed straight through into a large and busy train station. Platform 9 ¾, in case you didn't get that.

Harry boarded the Hogwarts express after handing what he hoped was an attendant his luggage. Most of the compartments were already filled with the red haired kids but Harry found one that only had a single red haired boy in it and took a seat.

"Hi, I'm Ron Weasley. You already met my family earlier, I think. I'm the second youngest of them and it's my first year!" The boy said after Harry entered.

"I'm Harry Potter and it's my first year too!" Harry told him.

"YOU'RE HARRY POTTER?!" Ron gawked at him and stared at his forehead. Harry realized everyone loved to do that in the wizarding world. Must be some form of greeting to them?

"Um, yeah?"

"Do you have... The... Scar?" Ron ended in a whisper, still staring at Harry's head.

"This one?" Harry revealed his scar and Ron nodded aggressively, pointing at his forehead.

"Wicked!"

"Yeah, I got it when some mad man tried to shoot me or something after killing my parents. How do you know that I have it anyway?" Harry said with a raised eyebrow. Ron didn't answer him, sweating profusely.

Before Ron had a chance to answer an ugly GIRL with bushy hair that was ugly and teeth that were also ugly burst into their train compartment. Harry leaned back, because her vibes were so snitchy and she seemed not chill, unlike his homie, Weasley #???.

"There's a TOAD LOOSE IN THE TRAIN!" she cried. "Have any of you seen a toad?"

The boys looked at each other and shook their heads. "We haven't seen a frog, or whatever you're looking for," Harry told her, but then her eyes widened like a nerd.

"You're...Harry Potter! I read all about you in my books! It's a pleasure to meet you! I'm Hermione Granger btw."

"...er. What book was I in?"

"Well, one of them was The History of Harry Potter by Albus Dumbledore. Another one that stands out is How to be a Master Manipulator and Allow an 11 Year Old Child to be Neglected by his Relatives by A.P.W.B. Dumbledore, but it wasn't that good of a read."

Harry stared and decided not to ask.

"Well let me or Neville know if you find his toad, thanks. And by the way you have dirt on you- AHHH A RAT!"

A rat crawled out of Ron's jacket then dove back in after looking at Harry. Weird.

"That's just Scabbers! Leave now please thanks." Ron said defensively. Herminny? Or whatever her name was left. Later on the train ride, a lady rolled a cart full of sweets past their compartment. Upon seeing that Ron was POOR and only had a SANDWICH for the ride, Harry bought the entire cart and gave the lady the wizard equivalent of a $1000 tip.

They dug into their candy and Harry nearly cried as he ate a frog made of chocolate but Ron told him it was only alive because of magic. That was reassuring.

"Hey, I got Dumbledore on this card! And he is moving around, that's weird," Harry said. Ron didn't seem to think it was weird at all really. "Dumbledore is the Headmaster of Hogwarts and famous author of the bestselling 'Life of Harry Potter' book series?" Harry read off the card. He suddenly realized he had probably been stalked his whole life.

The rest of the ride was a blur but it was the most fun Harry had ever had in his sad orphan life. Sitting in a train with an ungodly number of snacks with one of the Weasley clones.

They arrived at Hogwarts, which was apparently a huge castle somehow. Hagrid directed them to get into the boats to cross the moat in order to get to the school, which was a weirdly inconvenient form of transportation, when these people could literally use magic. Anyway, Harry climbed into the boat with the weasley kid, ugly girl, and some guy. They sailed to the castle and waited outside of some huge doors for a "sorting test."
"Oh no! I didn't study for this test!" Hermione cried, digging through a stack of flashcards and books, tears in her eyes.

"I heard that they make you make out with one of the ghosts and then they sort you into one of the houses. I need to get Gryffindor, Harry, you don't understand. I'm literally going to be ostracized from my entire family just for being sorted into a different house of a school for 11 to 17 year olds which is a normal thing to do, just like caring about which college team you root for."

"Well I'M going to be a Slytherin btw just in case you cared, which you obviously did," a blond boy with blond hair said. He also looked super mean because his face looked pointy or something.

"Uh yeah whatever, mate, no one asked," the Weasley next to him said.

Blond guy's nose flared like he was a shark that sensed blood in the water (evil). "Red hair, hand-me-down clothes, british, blood type A, lives at The Burrow, father is Arthur Weasley who works at the Ministry-" he tapered off, noticing that they were all staring at him. "Ahem, anyway. You must be a Weasley." The Weasley that might've been Ron from the train didn't say anything.

"Anyway, Potter, my name is Draco Malfoy-" Ron(?) chuckled and Malfoy glared at him, "-and you will come to find that some wizarding families are stupid. You can join the Weasleys and be lame, or join me and be racist. Which sounds more fun to you, really?" Draco extended a hand to Harry. Honestly being racist DID sound more fun than being lame but he knew that it just wasn't right and it was the 90's now!

Harry slapped Draco's hand away and spat on it and then did a little fortnite dance to show him he meant business. "Racism is NOT COOL, Malfoy." All the students gasped and their eyes sparkled as they looked at The Boy Who Lived. Wow.

The doors burst open and a lady with a cool hat and girlboss vibes showed them through. At the front there was a hat sitting on a stool and there were students sitting on the long benches, staring at them. Also the candles were floating somehow and the ceiling was like outside, which is NOT what ceilings usually look like. Weird.