"In New York you can become a man"
The Hamilsquad in one of the worst times to be a human: 8th grade
I'll have more details inside but that's pretty much all you need to know other than I'm writing this from the first day of school to the last day o...
"Oh my gosh- you like him? don't you?" Peggy asked me.
"Pshh, maybe? I don't know. I just think he's cute," I sighed. "And besides, he would never like someone like me- I don't even know anything about him!"
Angelica stopped reapplying her lip gloss and stared me dead in the eyes. "Elizabeth Phillipa Schuyler, you are an amazing girl. You should go and talk to him!" Angelica shook me. I laughed.
"Okay, fine!" I smiled as I left the bathroom. Peggy followed but Angelica stayed behind to fix her hair.
---
My sisters and I were all sitting at a table eating lunch. Peggy, my younger sister, was talking about how birds aren't real but I was too bust staring off at Alexander and his friends.
I've gone here since pre-school and I've known John since then, Herc since Kindergarten, and Laf since fifth grade.
Herc had half an orange placed on his lips and pressed them against his friends' faces.
"I am not gonna kiss someone with orange lips!" John shouted, chuckling at his idiotic friend. Herc sighed.
"Uncultured swines," He muttered.
"'Liza, Liza, Liza, You listening?" Peggy shook me out of my trance.
"Oh yeah, sorry."
"Ugh, you're so in love with him!" Peggy whisper shouted.
"Am not!"
"Ooh you're blushing!" I covered my face.
"I'm not in love with him!" I broke out into a fit of laughter.
"Angie, tell her that she's in love with him," We both turned to Angelica who was gazing off into the distance.
"Oh yeah, she totally is," I rolled my eyes.
"Pfft, whatever,"
---
Ever since I met Alexander, my life has been simultaneously ruined and fixed. I've never had a crush on anyone. When I first talked to him, we were in class. I had never met someone who made me feel this way. It feels like my lungs are twisted and my throat is dry and when I'm around him, I suddenly notice every insecurity about the way I look or act. I was never one to change myself for someone else but- maybe I should?
I don't know what's happening.
"Elizabeth Phillipa Schuyler, you are an amazing girl. You should go and talk to him!"
"Okay, fine!" They both left the bathroom. I felt my eyes begin to sting before warm tears began trickling down my face. I didn't even realize I was crying. I quietly sobbed in the corner of the bathroom. Half hoping no one would open that door, half hoping someone would and come and comfort me.
I didn't even know why I was crying.
I guess because I liked Alexander but Eliza liked Alex, I couldn't stand knowing that if he fell for anyone it would be Eliza. Don't get me wrong, Eliza's amazing. She's not only my sister, but one of my best friends. I could never hurt her by going after Alex. She would be devastated. So I chose to stay here. Alone. Without the need for Alex.
I splashed the water in my face and walked out the door, pretending like nothing happened.
At lunch, I felt a little better. Peggy was talking about everything from the Mandela Effect to The Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on Netflix. I softly smiled until I saw Eliza looking at Alexander. I felt my smile wipe away and I remembered why I was sad.
"Angie, tell her that she's in love with him," Peggy giggled as she spoke.
I remembered that I was supposed to be happy and laughed along. "Oh yeah, she totally does,"
It was only the first week of school and I already wanted to give up.
>>>
wowzers, I did a little angst.
and a pov change
I totally also didnt sob in the bathroom at school today hahahaha
