Split H

Confession of Sins

~~Hisano~~

Friday October 16, 2013, it was 8:57 in the evening, and Haru was explaining to me about the details of the flashback form his past, that we had experienced last night.

He explained to me about his experience of having a strange man breaking into his bedroom and raping him.

He even explains the details of how he got up and shot the man, and how he had even chopped him up after wards, to make the disposing of his body easier for him.

He also explained the details of how he couldn't breath when the man was on-top of him, and how he's still been having breathing problems since then. (I guess that explains a lot for that problem)

While he's telling me this, I can sense that he's starting to feel emotional again, so I try and comfort him.

"Haru, I'm really sorry you had to go through that." I pause for a moment, and then speak again.

I begin to support him by telling him that he's not the only one. Then I remind him of how we've first met, before I started to explain to him my own confession.

"Haru, remember when we firs met, I was crying underneath the apple tree, and then you saw that I was lonely, so you asked to be friends?" He pauses for a moment, but then says yes.

"I told you that I was crying because my dad was abusive and how he'd blame me for my own mothers death... and you explained how you were lonely because you got bullied for being a cross dresser, and your parents were never home." "Do you remember that?" I ask.

He nodded his head yes. "Of course I remember." He replied reassuringly.

"Well, when I told you that, I was only telling part of the truth." I start to confess...

I explained to him how part of the truth is that I was crying about my dad, but I didn't tell him the full reason about why I was upset over him. I told him how on the night before we had met/become friends, my father was hurting me again, and how I had stabbed him out of self defense.

I told him how we were fighting in the kitchen, and that's how I had gotten the knife in my hands.

I told him how my father had thanked me for stabbing him, because he felt he deserved it, because he had told me how originally, when I was first born, he didn't want to hurt me at all.

I said how he told me that he was sorry for all the things he did, and that he didn't mean it. But he let his emotions overcome him.

I said how he told me how he hoped to have been reborn as a better him, and that I'd be able to meet the better him.

I told Haru that my father's last words, were him calling me princess, and how I've been feeling bad for doing that to him ever since.

After hearing this, Haru and I both had paused in silence, but then he whispered "I'm sorry." I told him that it was okay, and that it was in the past.

After having that conversation with him, we both promised each other not to be keeping secrets from each other again, and that it's better to be helping each other, than to be leaving each other out.

Well, I cant believe that we're still friends after this, but I guess it's because it's another thing we have in common, in this relationship. (That we've both had a bad past.)

In the end, we're still best friends who are willing to help each other learn from each others mistakes.

As long as we have each other to help get through this mess, then through our support, that's the only way we're able to survive, and the only way we're able to live.