Here's the first chapter, and the first Lazy Punch. Lazy Punches are a collection of random Canon events that happen outside of the main plot, basically filler. Enjoy
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Lazy Punch 1: Random Moments
Linc, Eva, Jason, Drew, and George were in the supermarket. Lincoln walked by some Walkie-Talkies and a thought came to his head.
Linc: What if the person who named Walkie-Talkies, named everything?
Eva: Pregnancy tests would be Maybe Babies
Jason: Socks would be Feetie Heaties
George: Forks would be Stabby Grabbies
Eva: Defibrillators would be Heartie Starties
Jason: Nightmares would be Dreamy Screamies
George: Stamps would be Lickie Stickies
Drew: (annoyed) You are all f**king disappointments...
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Lincoln was sharpening his cooking knives when a thought came to him.
Linc: Responses for being stabbed with a knife?
Eva: Rude.
Drew: That's fair.
George: Not again.
Jason: Are you going to want this back?
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George was pouring hot coffee but spilled some on his hand and dropped and broke both the pot and his cup.
George: I'm an idiot.
Eva: ...
Drew: ...
Linc: ...
Jason: ...
George: ...
Eva: If you're waiting for us to disagree, this is going to be a long day.
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Linc and Jason were sorting movies, and Linc found a bunch of Horror movie sets.
Linc: What are your guys' favorite horror movies?
Eva: It.
Drew: Saw.
George: Annabelle.
Jason: High School Musical. After watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I'd be the only one who didn't know the lyrics.
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Drew was looking at his phone while everyone was going about their business.
Drew: What does 'take out' mean?
Linc: Food.
George: Dating.
Jason: Murder.
Eva: (Outside) IT CAN MEAN ALL THREE IF YOU'RE NOT A COWARD.
Jason: ... I don't even want to know what all three entails.
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Linc and Drew were leaving the apartment building, and Linc had a coupon book in hand.
Linc: Bye Eva! Bye George! Bye Jason! Bye Eva!
Drew: You said 'bye Eva' twice.
Linc: Out of all you crazy bastards, I like Eva more.
YOU ARE READING
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