Love, High-On! | | JJK

11

"It's a chance life is giving you. You are being too ignorant. See it. Live it."

He had said and somehow even after two hours, my brain is stuck to those words.

This is the worst chance life must have given to anyone. I laugh remembering his words. Sometimes, he's a plain idiot. I might need to see his degree. How could he be a therapist? The job just doesn't suit him.

I look down at the paper and the medicines in my hand.
Some stupid antidepressants and other shits he had given me. I throw them on the side and pull out a jacket from my wardrobe.

Brother, Father, both on a business trip. House is all to myself but I'm not staying in tonight.

Gonna go to the frat house tonight. Meet some friends—I'd better have enemies—and get back to my usual self.

Jungkook has been messing up with me a lot lately. Because of him I'm just not in my right mind. Those two pills are still in my drawer and I haven't touched them for some reasons.

Tonight I'm gonna throw Jungkook out of my brain and pretend to be in the time period that existed before Jungkook came into my life—the empty time period.

My phone rings.

And that's not the phone Jungkook gave me. Another phone that I just purchased out of my own Fucking pocket money—it's gonna be a
secret—rings.

I take the phone and rush out of my house. "Coming." I speak on the call and as soon as I hang up I'm already standing on the doorsteps.

The black shiny racing bike comes in the line of my sight. It's a familiar piece of material. And I've rode on it several times but still everytime I am afraid to get on it.

You know why? Because I don't trust the guy driving it. He's the worst driver I've ever known but still, I don't know how, we have never got into an accident and I never even got a scratch.

Ethan winks at me flirtatiously waving a hand. I roll my eyes taking steps closer to him.

Ethan is a tall man. He is taller than most of the guys. He has green eyes with a hint of blue in them. He has the most beautiful pair of eyes I've ever seen—yes, only if he is not high.

God literally snatched away everything from him and gave him good looks instead.

When I am close enough, he pulls me by my waist and kisses my cheeks. I resist the urge to punch him in the face. I don't force out a smile either. I look at him taking in his outfit. Nothing special.

Just a plain black T-shirt that gives a nice view of his biceps and puffed up chest—must have taken months of workout—loaded with silver chains around his neck. His tight black ripped jeans give a glimpse of his muscular thighs. Ethan has nice curly fluffy hair. He is a sucker for jewelleries. His fingers are full of rings and he has impressive ear piercing.

Tell me.

Who would not fall for his charms?

He is grinning at me and his smile can light up the whole town. He could have been the best person I've ever seen—only if I had just seen him from far.

Things look pretty from a distance. When they come closer, they are rather real, or I might say ugly.

"Hey babe." His arm is still around my waist and I'm wondering why I haven't twisted it and broken it into two pieces just yet.

"Hi." If I use this tone with anyone else they would never talk to me, but Ethan is different. No matter how rude I am or how hard I try to show him that I'm uninterested, he keeps sticking with me.

And now tell me.

What more reason do you want to hate someone? 

"You look pretty." He eyes me up and down. I scoff internally. I am literally in the oldest pair of clothes I've ever owned and a jacket that I bought a year ago and wanted to return it just the next day but kept it anyways.

"We are getting late." I remind him. "Right! Let's go." He swings his legs across his precious bike and passes me a helmet. I sit behind him.

"Hold me tight darling." I cringe at the use of nicknames that doesn't suit me and he doesn't have any rights to call me.

Nonetheless, I wrap my arms around his waist tightly because I ain't falling off this bike and dying in an accident.

I catch a glimpse of his stupid smirk from the side. Jerk.

I really don't get it. Why am I still hanging out with him?
Why can't I cut off my connections with him?

He starts the engine and soon we are hitting off the road with so much speed that I can barely open my eyes.

He slows down moments later.

"Tonight is prettier." He says to me. I hum in response. His voice is nice.

But I feel myself drifting off to the thoughts of Jungkook. Jungkook's voice is nicer. When Jungkook talks to me, everything slows down. He is gentle and loving.

And definitely not my type.

Get a hold on yourself y/n.

He parks his bike and I get off catching my breathe. Bike rides can be so dangerous with Ethan. I feel his stare on me.

He giggles and ruffles my hair.

If I was fifteen, my heart would have fluttered. I would have been shy. I wouldn't be able to sleep for nights.

Ethan is the only person I've ever had the biggest crush on. I have crushed on him for three years. He was a classmate of mine back in school.

The first time I saw him, I was thirteen. He was a new transfer student. 

His smile was the first thing I saw and that time I thought he is the one for me.

He wasn't.

Sometimes, when there's a click when you first see someone and you feel like they are the one you are meant to spend your lifetime with, you are wrong.

Your heart may not be always right.

Moreover I was barely a teen. People get mistaken at that age very too often.

That was the time I was crazy for him. And unknowingly he was the one who kept me going. There was a time when he was the reason I wanted to be alive.

Maybe, that's why I am here. Right by his side even when I don't want to, respecting the feelings of my fifteen year old self. That girl deserved all the happiness in the world.

"Let's go." He takes my hands as we walk. I'm so familiar with his touches but every time he touches me, it's strange and awkward.

Just, that I don't feel butterflies anymore. I am not affected anymore. Had he done this to my fifteen year old I would have fainted at the spot.

Fine. Enough of my past.

We squeeze past through sweaty, smelly bodies dancing like crazy. Ethan is sticking to me. I mean he is holding me tight as if he is going to lose me in the crowd.

Oh, how bad I want to push him away.

 
We reach the kitchen but only after almost every person has greeted Ethan. He is a popular boy in college.

And oh why not?

He is a good looking guy,
rich—orphan though but his parents left so much money that the next seven generations can live
lavishly—friendly, funny and kind of
talented—just not in studies.

Ethan thinks the world revolves around him. He is egoistic and self absorbed. And the second worst thing about him, is his anger.

The first one still being, his idiotic obsession with me.