52. (BoyxBoy)

52. Page 20.

Dedicated to cookiedough634, simply for being awesome!!

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Chapter 15

Aiden feared for the next school day, more than average: he feared the sight of Matt. He feared the mundane, controlling ambience of such a pressured place, every day. He feared Darren and his stupid gang. He feared the feeling of loneliness and helplessness. He feared the tests and bustling school life, making him feel stupid and unworthy of anything. He feared the brutish atmosphere of bullies and peer pressure, school work and teachers.

He didn’t see the point of it: life. If this were to be his future, then . . . why? Why did he continue to exist in this abysmal excuse of humanity? He had no reasoning.

He didn’t need to be here; to exist. For the daily torture, pain and struggle, he loathed Matt. Thoughts of fate and destiny tried to creep inside his head, but he couldn’t recognise them. He didn’t have the power to believe Matt saved him for a reason – it was too much of an effort. So, on Monday, Aiden slumped down in his chair and made plans for the 52nd day after the 52nd day of the year. That would be the 104th day of the year, but he didn’t like to think of it like that. The 14th of April: not a remarkable or memorable day, but a day nonetheless. And it wasn’t far off. It was, in fact, only 11 days away.

With his mind full of names of drugs to overdose on, suicide strategies and funeral plans, Aiden didn’t perceive the boy who sat down next to him. The boy, he noticed eventually, was Matt. He had huge bags under his swollen, red eyes. His hair hadn’t been brushed and his clothes certainly hadn’t been ironed.

“Hi,” Matt managed, weakly. Aiden nodded in response, gawping at his rundown and destitute appearance.”I’m sorry I went. I had to think,” Matt trembled. Again, Aiden simply nodded.

They didn’t speak for a matter of seconds, before Aiden attempted a limp croak, “Did you? Think, I mean?”

Matt ran a hand through his bristled hair and gave a faint smile. He nodded and said, “Yeah. Have you?”

Confused, Aiden whispered, “I always do.”

“Yeah,” Matt agreed, “You do.” His voice became physically powerful and he asked strongly, “Do you still want to go out with me?” Aiden rocked uncomfortably in his chair and looked around to see if anyone had heard Matt’s loud voice. “Don’t look at them,” Matt muttered, placing a hand on Aiden’s chest.

A loud sigh rand out through the classroom and as Matt and Aiden looked up, they met the gaze of a large brawly character, towering over them. “Matt, why are you here? With that?” He was, of course, referring to Aiden.

“What?” Matt said, rising up.

“Come on, man. Stop hanging out with that fag. He’s just some creepy tosser. Come sit with us, man,” Darren spat at Aiden, whilst aiming the conversation at Matt.

“What did you say?” Matt shoved Darren hard in the chest, anger spitting out of him.

“Woah, man. Why you taking it so personal” Darren’s voice wavered as he stepped back.

There was silence. Like, utter silence (that is, if you didn’t count the buzzing of the radiator or a few coughs coming from the direction of flu-ridden students). It wasn’t a calm quiet though, it was bitter with anticipation.

“Because, Darren,” Matt started slowly. He rinsed his words as he spoke them clearly and seemingly confidently. “It is personal,” everybody stared at Matt’s mouth as he forced them out, the room was sick with tension. “When,” Matt was taking a minute to pronounce each single word. “You,” he narrowed his eyes at Darren, “Insult my boyfriend.”