What Love Breeds

Chapter 1

"Um, sure," May answers. "A, Z, D, F, R, I think an O, U– Ow!"

There's a sharp prick in her upper left arm. May tries to turn, but the doctor's hand is at her chin, holding her stiff and steady. Her breathing quickens. "What was that?"

"Hm? What was what?" asks Dr. McCarthy, who doesn't loosen her grip.

"The- something pinched me," May says.

"I'm not sure," the doctor replies. "Let me take a closer look."

A tense moment passes before May feels the same sharp stab.

"Ow! That! What was that?"

Dr. McCarthy releases her, and May whips to her side. The tool tray remains covered, but two red welts are swelling on her arm. "What'd you do to me?" May pleads.

Dr. McCarthy shrugs. Her warm, kindhearted energy is unaffected. "I didn't see anything. Here, why don't you lie down for a minute?" She applies pressure to May's shoulders until May complies and is laid on her back. From here, May counts the flecks in the ceiling tiles. She's breathing too fast and her heart won't stop pounding. But there are four, five, six gray spots in this square, and seven, eight, nine purple. She keeps counting while the doctor hums a melody that nags in the back of May's mind. Something familiar, something calming. She can't tell how much time passes before she starts losing count. How many gray did she say? How many purple? She'll just have to start over.

May counts and counts and counts, and she can't get past ten - no, twelve - before she has to start over again, and again. Surely, hours have gone by when the doctor helps her sit back up. May grips the edge of the table as the room spins into focus. She doesn't remember the doctor asking her to exchange her clothes for a baby pink medical gown, or where her clothes went, but the doctor is shining a bright light in her eyes now and it stings.

"How old are you, Essie?" Dr. McCarthy asks with a chart in her hand.

Twenty-one but sometimes I lie and say twenty-three so people treat me a little better.

"Very good. And where are you from?"

What? You can hear me? Are you reading my mind?

The doctor laughs. "No, baby. You're speaking out loud. That's a very typical response to what you've been given, don't worry. Now, c'mon, where are you from?"

Oh. Okay. I'm from Garden Springs, Idaho. That's where my parents are from and where my whole family lives. I'm never going back.

"Mhm. And your family's why you came to Shaw Farms? All the way to Montana?"

Yeah. They won't leave me alone. And they'll take me with them if they can find me. I'm staying here and I'm not leaving.

"Good girl."

That feels...that feels really, really good, I like that.

"You like to be called a good girl?"

Yes. Don't tell anybody, though. That's embarrassing. Especially not Mr. Shaw.

"Our little secret, I promise. Why not Mr. Shaw?"

He was so, uh...uh..."

"Can't think of the word?"

No, I can do it. He was really big and important and smart. I don't want him to think I'm, like, stupid.

"Mr. Shaw would never think you're stupid. You're safe here, Essie."

May flinches.

That's...that doesn't sound right. I'm May.