"It's Peter. Peter Stark." || a Trans Peter Parker fic

Chapter 32

Peter- March 28th 2017

I get up as the sun rises over the school. It's early, too early. I stopped bothering going to school after Dad's visit last week, it isn't worth it anymore. MJ found out the next day when she followed me back, apparently I smelled like I need a shower (which I really do). I still haven't looked at the folder Dad left for me for the job. It would be helpful to get an actual roof over my head, but I can't take his money. Not after he made his choice. He chose Steve over me, which fine, whatever. He signed up to be a father when my aunt dropped me at his footsteps. When he signed up to be a father he signed up to care for me and make sure I'm safe and okay. He failed. Steve undoubtedly failed ten times more, but Dad failed too. He gave Steve somewhere to live. He gave him furniture and food, he made sure he was okay. He loves the man who hates his son. He loves the man who punched him in the face. He loves the man who can't love anyone. He can't even look at his son without anger. He loves the man who kicked his son to the streets, and he didn't even care. Sure- he tried to divorce him. Maybe it's my fault it didn't go through. It could've happened after I got out though, all they were doing was fighting after I came out, I don't know how there's still love after that. How he still cares so much for him after all that he's done.

I sigh and sit up in the bed, I look over to the folder that sits alone on my tote of clothes- another token from Dad. I decide that maybe it's time I look at the stupid folder. I get up from the bed and sluggishly walk over to the middle of the building to the bin. The folder is yellow and doesn't have a seal. One of the papers is practically falling out. I open it reluctantly and the first thing I see is a letter from Dad.

Dear Peter,

I know you're mad at me. You have every right to be. I miss you at home, please come back to me Peter. I remember the day your Aunt dropped you off like it was yesterday. You filled the house with so much light and happiness. I never thought your Pops would become the way he has. I never thought he was capable of such things. I'm sorry we've put you through this hell, Peter. But you must know that none of what happened is your fault. None of us are better of without you. You're my favorite person, Peter. We all miss you and want you home. We all thought giving you some space was the best idea. It's been ten days Pete, come home if you want. If you don't want to we can work something else out. Underneath this letter is an application for a job at the tower. I won't be there as much, I'll stay in the office and I'll keep my distance if that's what you want. I know I hurt you, I know your Pops hurt you, but I want to fix my mistakes Peter. I want a second chance to be a father to you. I tried so hard to support you through this but I can't do it by myself. I need to know what you need from me. I love you so much and I never want to lose you. I thought me trying my best to get your Pops to see you for who you are was the best solution. I didn't know how much the fighting was affecting you, I'm sorry that I didn't make myself more aware. I'm sorry that I didn't pay enough attention. I know you've been going out as spiderman lately, just be careful. It's a dangerous job being a hero. I thought I'd be able to help you through it. I thought me and your Pops would be able to train you to be the hero neither of us could be. You're the best of all of us Peter, and I hope you know that. Wanda hasn't stopped crying since you left, Pietro is furious with me for letting you go. Loki has been in and out of the tower, I assume he's been visiting you. I don't care that you like him Peter, I can get around to supporting you two. We all want you to come home Pete, you'll be welcomed with open arms. I know I can't force you to choose me, but I choose you Peter. I am your father and I will be a better one to you. You just have to give me some rope to grab onto first.

Take the job, Peter. At least to get you off the streets.

Love you,

Dad.

Tears swell in my eyes. How could he think that this stupid letter would bring me home? It's not even home anymore. Everything there is a negative void. Too much has happened. Too much has changed. I move the letter to the side and look at the application. At the top is another note, "I know you're smart enough for this. You're a Stark." I roll my eyes at the words and scribble them out with the pen sitting next to me. The application is for a job at the lab, working with other scientists, coming up with innovative ideas, making tech to change the world. I am smart enough to do this, but I don't know if I can work under him. I don't think I can take his meaningless pity money.

Hey everyone, Mush here! What do you think Peter should do?

I'm back from my break, thank you for being patient with me. I just needed some time to figure some stuff out.

Thank you for reading!