I'm in Love with my Worst Nightmare

Chapter 1

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Mom gave a half smile.
"I'm sure." I waved goodbye and climbed into my tiny Toyota. I was going to confront Cesar, he was released yesterday. He doesn't want know I am coming, that is what scares me. What his reaction will be is still a mystery to me. I pulled in front of the condo he was renting.
I can't do this. I can't just barge in. I have to let him know.
I pulled out my phone and found his number. The number still known as "Unknown Number." I clicked on the contact and changed the name to Cesar Aubour.

New message to Cesar:

A: um... Can we talk?
C: who is this?
C: sorry I don't know this number

Wow... The irony...

A: this is Avia
C: oh my god. Yeah hi. We should talk.
A: yeah.
C: meet for coffee maybe?
A: yeah. Ok.
C: Starbucks in a few minutes?
A: ok... C u soon.
C: ok. Thanks Avia

I did it. I just texted my stalker, so causally. I drove away from the condo and headed down the road to Starbucks. What was I going to say?
Oh yeah hey, I know you were in jail for stalking me and everything but it's cool, you know? By the way I still have feelings for you! So what's new?
Yeah... This is going to be awkward. I pulled into the parking lot and grabbed my purse. Here goes nothing. I scanned the coffee shop, he wasn't here yet.
"Can I have two dark roast coffees?" I asked.
"Sure thing, sugar." The large clerk asked. I waited as the barista prepared the coffee, when I heard the little bell at the door ring. Cesar. I grabbed the drinks and sat down at a table. I decided against waving him over, we aren't buddy buddy at the moment. He can find me. He searched the shop and his eyes met mine. He paced over to the little booth I sat in.
"I got you a drink." I mumbled as I handed him the coffee.
"Thanks." He sat down. "Listen, I'm not sure why you wanna talk but I just wanna let you know how sorry I am, Avia. If you're here to rip on me, I totally understand. If you want a restraining order, by all means get one." He said in his deep voice.
"You got a haircut." I blurted. Smooth, Avia. The guy just poured his heart out and you answer with 'you got a haircut.'
"Oh.. Umm... Yeah. New start, right?" He chuckled. His laugh was so... Sincere. His hair was completely different. It wasn't long and greasy and shaggy like before, it was short, gelled up, and clean cut.
"So, why did you want to meet?" He looked into my eyes.
"Ok. The second I saw you in court, I forgave you. I have been trying so hard to put this all behind me." I explained.
"Why? I was horrible, I was your worst nightmare!" He smiled.
"Because... God this is complicated." I forced a laugh.
"I'm complicated, Avia. I'll understand." His eyes twinkled. Damn... Not the twinkle.
"Cesar, I... I... Ok the second I saw you in court, every feeling I once had for you completely filled me. I still have feelings for you. And it's insane, because I know I should hate you. I should hate you so much, honestly. But I don't. I can't. I want to start over, I want to forget what you did and go back to being friends. But I can't do it if I don't hear from you that you are not the Cesar that texted me. You cannot be the Cesar I spent nights crying about after getting those texts." I said.
"Avia, when I was texting you, I was a mess. I was completely a mess. I was so mad that you moved, I was so mad at myself for everything. I screwed up. Big time. But I am not that screw up anymore. Heck I was released for good behavior. I don't want to be that guy that hurt you, Avia. I want to start over. I do. And I give you my promise that I left the old Cesar behind." He placed his hand over my shaky hand.
"Ok." I whispered.
"And I don't need want to rush things. It's obvious we both still have feelings for each other, right?" He smiled. I smiled back. "But let's just start fresh. I'm Cesar." He shook my hand.
"Come on Cesar. That's so cheesy." I chuckled. "But hi. I'm Avia."
"Nice to meet you, Avia." He smiled.
"Yeah I'm done with this." I laughed. "Let's just... Talk. Like the old Cesar and Avia." I said.
"I'm game for that." He smiled. "Avia, if you ever decide you don't think this will work, you know, us being friends, tell me. I will understand. What I did is unforgivable. So if you change your mind, if this is all too much, that's ok." He said.
"That won't happen. I was taught to forgive, and I know you have changed. Yeah this is all still... Surreal... But this was my decision, I want us to start over. So don't hang over what you did, I forgive you." I sipped my coffee.
"Thank you, Avia." He said. A tear rolled down his face. "I'm so sorry. God Avia I'm so so sorry." He put his face in his palms.
"Cesar. I forgive you." I moved his palms away from his face. "Everyone messes up."
"You are amazing, Avia. If I were you I would hate my guts." He laughed.
"Trust me I hated your guts for a bit." I smiled. "But I don't want this to hold me back. I'm an optimist, you know?" I chuckled.
"You always were." He smiled as he sipped his coffee. "So let's just talk, friend to friend." He said. "How's your family doing?"
"Wow. Crazy." I laughed. "Everyone's growing up so fast!" I said.
"Gosh I know. I mean look at you, you're not the little girl I used to see every day at school. I'm not the kid who looked like a girl with his hair anymore, either." He laughed.
"Aw you never looked like a girl." I said. He looked at me sarcastically.
"Okay I little bit." I laughed.
"So how old is the Butler bunch?" He asked.
"Well... Let's see Gavin's 20. He's planning on proposing to his high school sweetheart. Emmi is 16, Brock is 13, Daxton is 9. And then they had two other kids after we moved. Greyson is 6, Claire is 3." I laughed. "I know... It's a lot to remember."
"No kidding!" He said.
"You still play soccer?" I asked, remembering how much he loved it in fourth grade.
"Nah. Gave it up in high school. I decided I had other interests, I'm planning on heading to college next year to study biochemical engineering." He explained. "I went from total jock to total nerd."
"Yes you did." I laughed. "I took a year off before college, too."
"What are your plans next year?"
"I'm not exactly sure. I'm thinking something along the lines of fashion design." I said. "But I also have an interest in wedding planning."
"You were always such a fashionista." He chuckled. "Good for you, Avia."
"Yeah, I still am undecided. Neither make good money."
"Hey, as long as you enjoy it, who cares about money." He smiled.
"Corny." I cracked up.
"I'm a corny kinda guy." He smiled. "This is nice, Avia. I'm glad you wanted to start over. I wanted this more than anything." He said.
"Me too." I smiled. "I couldn't just leave you in the dust, after all these years."
"You're seriously amazing. I wish my heart was half as big as yours."
"It is! Don't say that! Just because you screwed up doesn't make you a bad person." I said.
"Thank you, Avia." He stood up and tossed his empty cup in the trash. "This was so nice."
"I agree. Let's keep in touch, alright? I heard you're staying in Idaho?"
"Yeah. Police decided I needed to stay until my full sentence was carried out. Then I am free to move back." He explained.
"That's cool. Goodbye Cesar." I smiled. He hugged me.
"Bye Avia."
After we both went our separate ways, I waited in my car. Thinking. I just did that. It went so... Amazing. It was truly like we did start over. And it felt perfect.

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Chapter one done!! I am loving this book already, I plan on making all the chapters long like this, but that means updates might be every other day. Hope you enjoy it so far!