Comfort - CH.31

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"C'mon, we ain't really here to talk about them." Naruto sighed, missing for a moment that the other had just called him by his short form. Only looking up in giddy shock when the hamster finally decided to get back in it's wheel. "Aaaaa—!" He started screaming, only to get quieted by two pale palms forcefully covering his mouth with a soft "no." - earning the redhead a muffled 'babe' in response.

"The hell did you call me?" Gaara asked, momentarily forgetting the worries that had previously been plaguing him only seconds ago. "I called you babe. Uhh. Is that okay? Or.." Naruto chuckled, scratching the back of his head in embarrassment. Noticing the small red hue that crept over the other's cheeks. "If you don't like that.. I could always call you my rose?"

Fidgeting with his hands nervously, Gaara gave a shallow nod and replied with a soft crack to his voice. "I like.. Rose."
His voice faltering as he admit which he was more comfortable with being called. Coming around the counter, he stood in front of the other teen. Pale hand gently moving to press against the other's upper abdomen before sliding it along the blonde's side and back. Moving in for a bit of a withdrawn hug. Still not too used to the sensation nor action of hugging others. But as tanned arms wrapped themselves around his shoulders and the slightly taller of the two moved his head to burry into the neck of the sensitive redhead. Gaara could only shiver as he felt his cheeks catch fire. Their blush a deep honey pink that he hid away into the jumper of his boyfriend. Like a living comfort blanket, Gaara felt at true peace in the arms of the other jinchuriki.

He'd forgotten all of his worries in the presence of the blonde.  It was a good feeling. A safe feeling.
One he didn't want to let go of.

"Hey.. Gaara." Naruto muttered softly, wanting to place his own doubts to rest as he held the sand-nin in his arms. "I'm.. I'm not smothering you am I? You would say something if I was.. right?" He asked openly. The last thing Naruto wanted was to ruin something that felt so perfect to him, by getting too clingy or overbearing with his affection. He'd always had so much to give, but never anyone who was willing to receive his affection for more than a short moment. Maybe because he was too unfocussed. Maybe because he could be too hyperactive or talkative. The reasons he had where plenty and it hurt him deep inside to accept. "No. I like us how we are... But.. I think it's going to take me some time to get used to."

"Well, I'm not planning on going anywhere just yet." Naruto smiled, leaning back so he could look the other in the eyes before pressing their foreheads together. "Ya'know. When you came to the hospital and offered to get me out of there.. I wasn't sure if I was willing to go." The blonde started. Remembering just how on guard and confused he felt when the other had visited him in the hospital. "But.. With everything that's happened. I'm really glad I did." Going with the other had been like a living trust fall and he was happy he took the chance to trust the other after the history they had.

It made the blonde wonder just how much the redhead had to have changed to become the way he was now. Or was he always like this to begin with and was just too afraid to show it? "Can I ask ya' something serious?"

Naruto piped up, finally letting the other go from the warm embrace. Giving the other space to breathe and relax as he used his bare foot to push in the stool he had been previously sitting on. "Sure. Can we sit?" Gaara asked. Still feeling the steady exhaustion from his cold and how it was slowly turning his legs to jelly like before when he had fallen.

Sitting on the couch with the other, he moved aside some of the plastic protective covering that came with the brand new furniture and let it sit in a crumpled mess on the ground. Promising himself that he would clean it later. "What did you want to ask?"
"Well.. I wanted to know why you changed. I mean.. From who you used to be. Or what made you change?" Naruto's question was to the point. He was willing to let it settle if the other wasn't comfortable with answering him, but it was a question that had nibbled away at his subconscious for quite a while since the failed recovery mission. When the sand siblings had come to help, Naruto felt both grateful and confused. Not sure exactly why they would risk their lives to help them other than just being 'allies'.

"Well.. You."
Naruto almost missed the two word answer Gaara had suddenly given him. Having been so withdrawn into his own thoughts for the moment to notice the other staring deeply into his cerulean blue hues. "Me?" He asked in return, bewildered at how he could have made such an impact to change so much in the other. But then, it struck him harder than anything. "OH! Are you talking about our first fight? When.. When you asked me why I fought for my friends?"

"Yes." Gaara replied simply. He couldn't exactly find the words to describe just how much that single moment in his life had opened his eyes to the world around him. After Naruto, he stopped seeing the things in his life and the people around him as nothing more than walking obstacles to remove and destroy. He felt like he could truly see colour beyond simple hues and tones, even to the point that he began to collect and cultivate cacti and rare desert flowers. The emotional impact that Naruto had on him was far beyond a scale he could measure with and it wasn't something he wanted to think too deeply into.

"I... I don't know how to explain it. But. You helped me and because you helped me.. I could change."
Sitting upright, he watched the other slouch back into the couch with a thoughtful expression that turned into a bright smile. The kind that made the vessel feel like everything was fine. "I think I get it." The blond spoke up, resting his hands behind his head for a moment while he thought about anything else he may have wanted to ask the other in his company. "Hey though.. What about. Ya'know.. Killing." He whispered the last word, almost like he was afraid it would awaken something in the other. Or at the very least, would awaken the demon within. "Don't you still.. get like cravings or something?"

"Not really. Killing was a way for me to feel alive. It was an adrenaline rush. Not to mention, having Shukaku lie to me and make me believe they where my mother in demand of blood.." The vessel said in hesitations, almost worried about stirring the one tailed beast within. "After we fought.. I realised a few things about myself and ...them? I understood that I didn't need to kill to feel the same rush of emotions I had when we fought and after. I also realised that something was deeply wrong with my so called 'mother'."  Looking down to his hands, he rubbed the pads of his fingers and thumbs together. Almost able to remember the feeling of blood between them. "When you feel nothing in your life.. you'll do anything to feel something. And when you can't hurt yourself.. The next thing is to hurt others." He said softly. Understanding openly just how heavy his thoughts and beliefs used to be before he came in contact with the other jinchuriki.

"That's... Awful." Naruto said simply. Staring up to the ceiling in the silence of the room. He had no idea that his love had once felt these things. Sure he knew Gaara hadn't been completely on his rocker for quite a few years. Especially before and during the exams. But he never thought it could have been that off. Naruto knew what it was like to be feared for simply having a sealed beast within him. The rumours, the glances and avoidance by almost everyone in his village. But to be feared for those AND because you where a known killer? He couldn't even decide on how the idea made him feel. Sure he could only guess that the people Gaara killed where mission based only and not just random civilians. But even still, Naruto had his own reservations when it came to taking a life. He'd never done it before, only ever having knocked his enemies out at most and the one time he had witnessed true death in the mist? It destroyed him for weeks if not for his Sensei's consoling.

"...Yeah. It was." Gaara hushed. Looking out the window to the slowly setting sun.
"But.. It's behind me now and for once, I think I'm glad it is."

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