My Dear Lover

Chapter 29 The Truth

Luna

No matter what I told Kelly, she sat completely silent. Absorbed every moment, very seldom did she ask questions, but when she did, she waited patiently for me to recount as much as I could. It was close to seven at night when we finally stood from our seats. My back and shoulders protested loudly when I tried to right myself.

I had told myself that I would only share what was necessary, but found that I told her far more than I had planned. It was like a dam broken, spilling out some of my darkest secrets...not all. There were some things no one could ever know about. Some things that were solely mine. Things that I would never tell anyone.

Ever.

"Luna, you know that I have to report this...right?" Kelly looked exhausted. Her makeup was separating, smudging under her eyes from her mascara. Her nude lipstick had completely rubbed off. I don't think I've ever seen her with a hair out of place and yet it occurred to me that she was very pretty.

I didn't immediately respond, I knew that was probable. "Will I need to talk to the police?"

Kelly rubbed her forehead with the palm of her hand. "Yes but this is a good thing. You talk to them and it will go on record that you are cooperating, that you are trying to help yourself and the people who he hurt."

That I was testifying against Martin...that's what she wasn't saying. It would go on record that I was accusing the man I called mine, of murder.

I nodded, remembering my lawyer begging me to accuse Martin of kidnapping, of rape, of anything at all, but back then wanting nothing more than to be with Martin. Now, I think of it after saying all those things out loud instead of hiding them in my memory and I ask myself why I hadn't done it sooner.

You love him...

NO!

No, I don't. That's not love!

"Will I have to see him?"

Kelly shook her head. "Not if you don't want to. I'll make sure of it." The older woman walked around her desk and stood directly in front of me. She didn't touch me, but she had a way about her that made me feel protected in a sense. Not in an 'I'll never let anything hurt you' but in a 'you're safe in this space with me' kind of way. "I want you to know that I am going to do everything in my power to make sure that you feel you are able to rejoin your friends and family at the end of these two weeks and even when you don't feel like you will be okay, I will make sure to arm you with the resources to get you back to that point."

"What about Casey, his visitation rights? Ivan?" That was truly the only thing I was interested in. I would tell them anything so long as I was able to at the end of it all, get back to Casey and have Ivan in my life.

Kelly took a deep breath. "I will give him a call tonight. See if maybe he can make it out next week." I opened my mouth to suggest tonight, but she saw it in my eyes before I could say a word. "Visitation hours are over..." She looked unsure before speaking again. "Maybe he can make it out tomorrow,." She said, giving in just a little and for that, I was grateful.

I nodded my head defeatedly. Tomorrow was better than next week and next week was better than never. At this point, I'd take what I could get.

"Luna, I know that there is much more to discuss, but I want you to know..." Kelly tucked her dark hair behind her pierced ear, holding her other hand over her heart as her eyes became glassy only for a moment before blinking away whatever was in her eyes. "I am very proud of you for today. You have been fearless in sharing with me what you have."

I didn't know what to say so I nodded instead. "I have one more question." I said once the silence became too much.

"Go ahead."