Beyond Saturation

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17 July 2016

"Tae....wake up, tiger....Taehyung-ah....it's almost lunch-time.....Tae..."

Taehyung slowly opened his eyes, taking his surroundings in groggily with a frown. A few seconds of staring later, he jolted upright, almost clocking his mother in her chin in the process. 

"What's this place? Where's seobang-nim?! Wha-"

"After you fell asleep yesterday, I brought you here. You are not going back there, Tae. Divorce that monster," Seokjin said coolly from the couch that he was sitting on. 

"Huh? What?!" Taehyung's features morphed into pure confusion. "First tell me where we are," he said. 

"In a hotel, of course. We'll be returning to Daegu in the evening. Namjoonie knows a nice lawyer that can help you. We'll not be here in Seoul for another minute more after that," Seokjin explained without taking note of Taehyung's rapidly reddening face. 

"What nonsense are you talking about?! Aren't you going to take my opinion into account?! I don't want any divorce from him!! He is finally talking decently with me, do you want all of my efforts all these years to go to waste?! Did I go through all of that all these years only to leave him when he finally stops insulting me every time he opens his mouth?!" Taehyung asked incredulously without realizing that he had just revealed a crucial fact of his married life, something that he had never wanted to do. He didn't want his parents and brother to know that he was suffering because of Jeongguk all these years. 

"TAEHYUNG!!" Seokjin yelled, making Taehyung jump so hard that Seokjin felt guilty right away. Still, he continued yelling. He had to knock some sense into his brother. "GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER, WILL YOU?! WHAT PART OF LAST NIGHT WAS DECENT, TELL ME, HUH?! IF NAMJOON HAD BEHAVED THAT WAY WITH ME, I WOULD HAVE KILLED HIM WITH MY OWN BARE HAN-"

"Let's be practical, hyung. If Namjoonie hyung was like that, you would have covered it up as much as I did. And seobang-nim was high yesterday. It wouldn't have happened otherwise," Taehyung said coolly.

"More the reason to divorce him!! You wanna be practical?! Okay, let's be practical. If Namjoonie was like that, I would have reported him to the cops the first chance I got and then I would have contacted a lawyer and would have divorced him by the end of that month!! That is what I would have done! Not defend him and fight with the person that tries to help me!!" Seokjin exclaimed, his face glowing as red as Taehyung's one did. 

"Jinnie, let it go, he's still upset. Let's talk about it later," Namjoon said and grabbed Seokjin's arm, throwing a sympathetic look at Taehyung which had Taehyung's blood boiling more. He didn't need sympathy in this situation. He needed empathy. 

"Please don't fight again, Papa," he heard a small sad voice from the other side of the room that he hadn't looked at yet and found Junha cuddling close to Hyungsik with a crestfallen expression. 

Taehyung's eyes widened in horror. 'What are you doing here?!" he asked as he scrambled off the bed in panic. He couldn't imagine what catastrophe would occur after bringing Junha away from Jeongguk. 

He panicked more when Hyungsik just shrugged and continued sipping his coffee. "I'd say it's for best if you divorce him, Tae," he started so coolly that Taehyung had to take a double-take. 

Why was his father sounding so cool in such a grave situation? 

"But you look like you've already decided not to. There's nothing we can do to change your opinion, is there?" Hyungsik continued and Taehyung sighed as he shook his head. 

"Why are you being like this, Tae?" Seokjin asked and Taehyung turned to look at him again, his previous anger returning a little, "you think we are not there for you? Is that it? Is that why you want to stay with that monster?!" 

"No! Don't call him a monster! I am staying there for Junha. He can't be separated from his parents yet," Taehyung said, "I can't subject him to that kind of life. He needs to grow up with both of his parents."

"You do realize that he would have both parents even if you left, right?" Dahyun spoke up, her voice choking up in sorrow. "It's okay to think of yourse-"  

"NO!!" Taehyung yelled, his face turning a bright shade of red in rage. "IT'S NOT OKAY!! I'M HIS PARENT!! NOT THAT LADY!! IT'S ME!! Don't take that away from me, please!!" tears gushed out of his eyes and ran down his cheeks pitifully, "I'd rather die than lose the one reason I'm living for!! The day I lose him or his respect for me, I'm going to give up everything and I mean it," he sobbed uncontrollably. 

Seokjin rushed forward to hug him again. "I'm sorry, Tae, that's not what we were trying to say. I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he said, gulping as he rubbed Taehyung's back comfortingly. 

"I-I'd rather just die than los-"

"Shhhh, shh, don't say that, no one is taking Junha away from you, don't worry."

"I don't w-wanna lose his love too. I'd rather just di-"

"Taehyung-ah, shhhh, no more talks about dyin-"

"I don't wanna live this pathetic life anymore, hyun-"

"Jeon. Taehyu-"

"Don't call me that, p-please," Taehyung cried harder, "I don't wanna be associated with that name, I'd rather jus-"

"Okay, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I won't call you that. Stop talking about dying now."

Seokjin burst into tears when he felt his brother go limp in his arms a while later. He hadn't known his brother was harbouring such harmful thoughts inside himself all these days. He couldn't believe Taehyung was thinking so strongly of dying. 

And he wanted to help him. 

He so desperately wanted to help him, but he didn't know what to do. 

He looked helplessly at his mother, only to find her sobbing along with Junha, both of them hiding their faces against a tearful Hyungsik's chest. Namjoon had tears in his eyes too. He felt very bad for his brother-in-law. If only there was something he could do to help him. 

"Stay with us for a week at least, Tae. Stay away from that toxic atmosphere at least for a little while. Junha will have Dohyeon as a company back at Daegu. It'll be a change for him too," Seokjin said a couple of hours later when Taehyung woke up again. 

"But.....seobang-nim isn't going to be happy about his disappearance," Taehyung said. 

"It's okay. At least he'll understand your importance in your absence. Let's just hope for the best, huh? Please, Tae," Dahyun said. 

Taehyung bit his lower lip and looked down at the sheets under him. The offer did sound tempting. A week of breathing freely without any suffocation? It sounded wonderful. Even Junha would enjoy the time away from Jeongguk. 

With a sigh, he nodded and looked up gratefully at his brother. "Thank you," he said. 

"Shut up. You don't have to thank me for this. Just come with us and have some good time for yourself, okay?" 

"Okay," Taehyung said and for the first time in years, his lips pulled up in a small, natural smile.