Beyond Saturation

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Seobang-nim - husband-nim

This word is outdated and isn't used anymore, but somehow, this word fit the situation more than anything else could, so I had no option but to use this.

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21 March 2014

"Hi, hyung," Taehyung said with a sigh. 

"Hi, Tae, how are you?" his brother, Seokjin asked. 

"I'm fine, of course, what about you?" 

"I'm fine, Tae. How's Junha?" 

"He's fine too. How's Dohyeon?" 

"He's fine too. Namjoonie took him out to the dentist."

"Oh," Taehyung chuckled, "he must have put up a mighty tantrum, huh?" 

"Of course," Seokjin said with a chuckle and Taehyung could imagine him rolling his eyes fondly, "I gave him two on his butt and he went with his mouth shut."

Taehyung laughed, "my poor nephew," he said. "Namjoonie hyung didn't say anything?" 

"Of course not. I'd give him a couple too if he did," Seokjin said defensively, making Taehyung chuckle harder with a couple of tears leaking from the corner of his eyes before he could even realize it. 

Why couldn't he have such a carefree life with his husband? Why did he always have to feel so suffocated around him?

Before he knew it, he was sobbing. 

"Tae, why ar-" he hung up on his brother before he could ask him why he was crying. He didn't want to share his problems with his brother and start a pity party with him. He already didn't like his parents knowing about it. He didn't want his brother to know about it as well. 

His brother already knew his husband was very short-tempered and impulsive. He didn't need to know more. Those two reasons were why Taehyung was not present at his brother's wedding, after all. 

The thought of his brother's wedding made him cry harder. It was something he had looked forward to his entire teenage life, seeing as Seokjin was four years older than him. He had been sure his brother would snatch some hot guy and marry him off before Taehyung could even finish high school. His brother had always been a horny one, after all. 

However, fate had different plans. Taehyung ended up being the first one to get married, at the young age of twenty-one. 

To this day, he didn't understand why his parents had agreed to marry him to Jeongguk when the man was four years older than him, and with all the bad habits that a person could ever have. Smoker? Check. Alcoholic? Check. Womanizer? Check.

Maybe they thought he wasn't like that anymore.

Maybe it was the fact that Taehyung had only studied until high school. Could you blame him? Studies just didn't sit well with him. He was more of the type to roam freely and do what came to his mind instead of being tied down to a job. 

Maybe that was what made his parents so concerned. Maybe that was what made them search for an alliance. Maybe his parents were glad someone was at least willing to marry his gay self with such a low educational qualification. 

He had always been a funky, fun-loving person, but he had to put a full stop to everything after marriage. Yet, he didn't mind it. He thought if he alone compromised, everything would be fine. That things would fall on track at some point. 

What he failed to realize was that for a marriage to succeed, compromises were supposed to be made by both the parties, not just one. 

He failed to understand that what he was making was a sacrifice, not a compromise. He was sacrificing his entire self in hopes that his husband would get better at some point. That he would treat him better at some point in his life.