Beyond Saturation

N

Cos Bunbun asked~

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2 May 2016

It was just another normal day for Taehyung. 

Nothing special. 

One lesson thirteen years ago taught him not to even remember his wedding anniversary anymore. There was nothing other than more sadness to gain by remembering it, after all. 

Thus, it had been long since he forgot about this date. Long since he remembered the significance of this day. The day that he was officially sentenced to doom fourteen years ago. 

The only thing that happened out of order today was the call that he got from Jihyo, saying Jaewan was feeling weird. It was clear to him that she was panicking. Thus, without thinking, he grabbed the scooty keys and rushed to his in-laws' house, having already called an ambulance by then. 

The ambulance arrived right a few seconds after he did, and it was only as he waited outside the ICU along with his mother-in-law that he remembered to tell his husband about what happened. 

A small corner of his mind noted that this was the very first time since they married all those years ago that he was calling his husband. 'Pathetic,' he thought.

"What?" Jeongguk answered. It was new for him as well. 

"Y-Your father wasn't feeling well a-and I brought him to the hospital. I'm a-at the hospital right now with Eomeonim, thought I sh-should inform you about it," Taehyung said. 

"Hmm, finally did something useful. Text me your location, I'll be there as soon as I can," Jeongguk said and hung up before Taehyung could reply. 

Taehyung sighed and texted him their location, noting mentally again that this was the first-ever text that he was sending his husband. This was also the first conversation with his husband that did not include any insult. Funny, it took fourteen years for him to accomplish that. 

Taehyung wondered offhandedly if he would ever get to kiss someone in his life anymore. After getting engaged, the only kiss he had had was on the day of his wedding, when Jeongguk had no option but to kiss him with all the people around them. Other than that, nothing had ever happened between them. Hell, they hadn't even conversed properly until then, how could Taehyung expect more?

Not that he did expect, because Taehyung had reached a stage of saturation by then. He didn't care if he received love from his husband anymore. He didn't care if some kind of bond formed between him and his husband anymore. He didn't care if he lived or died anymore. Anything was fine by him. He was ready for literally everything now. 

He was saturated.

It was a dangerous stage of emotional maturity, but it was also helpful to an extent. Of course, he still cried when things became too much, he still got scared when Jeongguk came home drunk, he still cared for his son, but he could always come out of whatever emotion he was feeling pretty quickly, all thanks to his emotional saturation. 

But what he didn't know was that there was also another stage of emotional maturity that a person could reach. 

Beyond Saturation.

He didn't know that when one reached that stage, they would just....

He just didn't know. 

"Would it make me a bad person if I said I'm looking forward to better days now?" Jihyo suddenly asked, pulling Taehyung out of his thoughts. 

"Huh?!" Taehyung took some time to register her words. Of course, it wouldn't make her a bad person. He knew how much of a jerk his father-in-law was to her. That man was rude to literally every single person he met.