Frerard - Much More Than Friends (Part 2 of the 'Just Friends' Series)

4

Gerard knelt by the couch and brushed Frank's hair out of his face. He shifted a little in his sleep and scrunched up his face at the feel of his boyfriend's touch. Slowly his eyes began to open, as though he could sense that he was being watched. His bleary eyes came into focus on Gerard's face looking down at his with a hint of a smile upon it. He bent forward and kissed Frank's forehead.

"I'm sorry" he whispered, looking remorseful, as he removed his lips from Frank's head, but left his fingers running through his hair.

Frank smiled back at him and let out a little sigh.

"I'm sorry too Gee."

"You have nothing to be sorry about" Gerard replied. "I don't know why I was being such an asshole last night."

"No. I am sorry. I didn't realise how you felt about me being away" Frank said as he sat up on the couch and patted the seat next to him for his boyfriend to sit.

Gerard sat beside him and Frank lay his head down on his shoulder and wrapped his arm around his waist firmly, breathing him in and closing his eyes in contentment. He had hated going to sleep angry the night before. Frank never liked to end the day on a bad note and he had tossed and turned for hours, just wanting to crawl into bed with Gerard and make everything ok again. He had planned on being the one to apologise and make amends in the morning, so he was particularly pleased to wake up to Gerard smiling at him.

"I hate it when you're away" Gerard said honestly. "I miss you like crazy and can't wait until you're home. But that doesn't mean that I'm not happy for you Frank. And you do know I'm proud of you right?"

Frank thought back to their conversation from the night before when he'd accused Gerard of not being proud of his accomplishments, and he knew that wasn't true. He'd just said it out of anger at the way Gerard had spoken to him.

"Yeah. I know" he finally answered. "I was just a little taken aback to hear you all fired up like that. It's not like you."

"Maybe I should have talked rationally to you before we both got wasted. I shouldn't have bottled it all up."

"Bottled what up?" Frank asked, now sitting up and looking at Gerard intently. "Gee? Talk to me!"

Gerard shifted in his seat slightly so that he was now facing Frank. He didn't want to stir things up, but this had been eating away at him and was clearly causing problems by not talking about it. He took a deep breath and steeled himself to tell Frank exactly how he'd been feeling. Frank took a hold of his hand sensing that he was struggling to find the right words.

"I'm scared for us" he simply stated.

"Why?" Frank asked, rubbing his fingers over Gerard's knuckles. "We're happy aren't we? I know I'm away more, but I don't want you to ever doubt my love for you Gee. We have everything we could possibly want, so why would you be scared for us?"

"Am I everything you will ever want?"

"What?" Frank asked with confusion. "Of course you are."

Gerard swallowed hard and cleared his throat before continuing. "What if I was to say I wanted more?"

Frank sat back a little and just looked at Gerard with a bewildered look on his face. He appeared confused and nervous and suspicious all at once. "What do you mean?"

"It doesn't matter" Gerard backtracked in panic.

"No" Frank pressed. "Tell me what you mean?"

Gerard could feel tears prick at his eyes and his composure failing him. He dropped his head and looked at his lap as he spoke. "I want kids. And marriage. A family Frank. A family with you."