Steven Grant

44: Forever

So much time had passed and so many things had happened that I never expected would happen to me.

It's crazy to think that it all started with a personality disorder and a visit from an Avenger and his friend who happens to be Universe traveling genius.

I experienced so many unforgettable moments And got to meet wonderful people who became my Family.

For the first time ever, I felt complete.  As if I was not missing anything at all.

At the same time it felt like everything was about to change. And maybe it did.

Because the older you got, the more drastically things changed. And no matter how beautiful the change may be, it was still terrifying.

I just wasn't prepared for this whole change. 

Because to be honest, I never thought my life would ever change that much.  No matter how old I get.  Because I'm Steven Grant and I love consistency.

I hadn't even noticed how much had changed recently. Change was probably part of life. But it just wasn't part of my life.

I was looking for a specific book I wanted to show to Jo when I found a letter.

As soon as I read the first sentence of this letter, I realized which letter it was. It was the letter with which she had tried to say goodbye to me in writing, because she would not have been able to do it in person.

And even if this letter reminded me of a not so good time in my Life, it was still part of our story. And to see what has happened ever since this letter was written was truly amazing.

At the time this letter was written we weren't even really a couple and now I was about to marry her.

Not so long ago Jake, Marc and I were just one person, Jo was just Luna's younger sister and Luna was just Scott Lang's best friend.

In the meantime I connected so many memories with these people.

And while only 2 out of 4 of those people were actually related to me by blood, more or less, it felt like they were all my family.

Because actually, family wasn't just those who were related to you by blood.

Family consists of those people that are with you in the darkest and in the most beautiful moments.

They also consist of those people who make you laugh and really mad at the same time and the ones you miss when they're not around.

And no matter how bad some situations were, it was the good moments that managed to make the bad moments seem completely forgotten and meaningless.

I had found my family. My found family consisted of Luna, Jake, Marc and Jo.

Jake really isn't a bad person. First and foremost he is my brother. And he's a bit crazy sometimes, but he's also really cool.

Marc is a huge inspiration for me. He's the strongest person I know.

Jo never stops talking and sometimes she makes really bad decisions, but she's still very funny and kindhearted.

And then there was Luna. Luna is just perfect in my eyes.  She is incredibly intelligent and adorable.  Everything she does, she does with so much love and passion.

My friend group was basically perfect.

"Dinner is ready" I heard Luna say, loud enough for me to hear even though she was in the kitchen.

When I got into the kitchen, everyone was gathered there. Marc, Jo, Jake and Luna.

Apparently Luna had planned an entire dinner with our friends without my noticing.  But I didn't have a problem with that since we all spent time together all the time.

So I sat down with them and had dinner with them.

"You know, I was just thinking about how much has changed in our Life and like..how far we have come. I don't want to be all nostalgic , but we really experienced a lot of beautiful moments." I said while having dinner with my friends, breaking the silence.

"And the best part about all of this is that we shared these beautiful moments together." Jo replied and the others nodded in agreement.

"Well, I found out a while ago that I have a daughter, Jake realized that he would much rather be a good person, Jo met her biological family and found out a lot about herself , Luna and Steven are getting married soon and are expecting their first  child and all in one, we've all come really far." Marc said, pretending not to be all emotional about our conversation.

„Next thing you know, Steven and Luna will  move away from here. Probably to some family-friendly residential area where they will then raise all their future children and forget about our existence." Jake replied jokingly.

But maybe he was right.  While his answer was pure sarcasm, there was probably a grain of truth to it as well.

But I didn't want to think about that now.  Right  now I enjoy to be spending all of my time with my friends, who are so incredibly important to me.

"These drastic changes in our lives feel like our lives are part of an episode of Friends. Or a whole season even." Luna said while she was eating the cookies Marc had baked earlier.

"Well yes, and you are Monica Geller, You are a cook, you will marry your best friend soon and you the two of you will soon become parents."

„But that means that I'm Chandler Bing. I mean, there is nothing wrong with being Chandler Bing. Chandler is great. I love Chandler Bing." I replied.

And while I thoroughly enjoyed this conversation with all the Friends references, it also got me thinking.

I'm going to be a father really soon. And to be honest, it was only now that I really realized how scared I was of so much responsibility. 

Of course I was looking forward to it.  But it was also very scary.  Because this new phase of life will also cause a lot of change. 

Maybe change was a good thing.  But maybe not.  I asked myself so many questions. 

Starting with whether I would even manage to take care of such a small person.  Would I really be able to do that?

I didn't know the answer to those questions.  But I had to try.  And maybe the fear would subside when I hold this little human in my arms for the first time.

I knew I had to enjoy every single second of my life.  From now and forever.