ON THE WANE

14

Kammy's POV

   I sat still on the floor of my room. I was looking straight at my plain wall, my eyes unwavering.

    There was a soft knock on my door before it was slowly pushed open. I shut my eyes not bothering to see who it was.

    'I don't want to talk about it' I told whoever it was as soon as the door was shut.

     ' That's not why I'm here'. As soon as I heard Kaima's voice I opened my eyes. I looked towards where she stood just in front of the door. I noticed she looked a lot more lanky even though she was wearing a big blue long sleeve shirt. Her eyes, her eyes had dark bags underneath, they were also red and had swelled up like she had been crying. Why would she be crying?

    'C...Can I sit beside you' she asked as she wrapped both arms across her frail body.

    'You don't have to ask' I told her quietly. As she made her way towards where I sat, I realized I hadn't really taken notice of her all this while. I've been so caught up in my own drama that I didn't even think if she was doing okay.

     ' I need to tell you something' she spoke, breaking me out of my thought. I nodded without saying a word.

     'Kammy' she croaked out. I glanced at her and noticed tears had welled up in her eyes.

    'Hey' I called out as I wiped a stray one which fell.

     ' I'm not okay Kammy, I'm not' she cried out holding unto my hand that was on her face.

    'I know, I know and I'm sorry I've been in my own business that I didn't even-

     ' You know?' she asked cutting me off.

    ' Yeah I do, I do' I replied.

     'Wait' she called out as she adjusted herself to face me. 'You know I have leukemia?'

    I stared at her in shock, I couldn't believe what I had just heard. 'You have leukemia?' I asked in disbelief as I got up from where I sat.

    'Y..yes I thought y...you knew' she stuttered also getting up.

    ' When did this happen? I mean, when did you find out you had leukemia?' I asked.

    ' That's the thing, I.. I've had it since we were both in Secondary school' she blurted out. I stared hard at her in silence. Too say I was shocked was an understatement.

    ' How many years? How many years uhn?' I whispered as tears pooled in my eyes. 'I thought you were different, I thought you were going to be different. But guess what, you just added yourself to my betrayal list' I uttered in anger.

     'Kammy please I'm sorry' she begged as she moved to hold me, but I moved away from her , hurt flashed through her eyes.

      I shook my head . ' No you are not, you could have told me when you first saw the signs if you were really sorry, why are you letting me know now?' I asked firmly.

   ' Because-

    ' Because it's too bad to fix already right?' I asked cutting her off.

     'Because I thought it had gone! I thought it had gone Kammy, the doctor said that I...I was okay, that I was clear from it and that was m...months ago' she stuttered as tears began flowing down her cheeks. I realized I was crying to.

     ' So all those times mom came to pick you up from school, it wasn't for competitions, it was for chemo' I said looking straight at her . She nodded slightly.

     'Kamara I'm so sorry, I should have told you since'

   ' But you didn't, you did not and that's what matters!' I yelled in sudden anger. I noticed I was breaking and I was breaking fast.

     'Why are you saying this? Do you know how much courage it took me to come up here to tell you ? Kay even advised me otherwise!' she yelled back at me.

     ' There we go, Kay again, always hiding stuff' I murmured .

      'What is wrong with you Kamara?! Why are you always acting like the victim? You always act like you are the only one being hurt!'

     'Because isn't that the truth! Tell me one way I've wronged any of you? None? Yeah I thought so to, but you all just go about stabbing every piece of my heart. And congratulations, there's nothing left.' I stated ,smiling in mock happiness.

    'You hypocrite'. She called out to my surprise. 'You act like you don't have your own tiny little secret in there that you keep hiding'. She mentioned.

    ' Mine's not going to kill me Kaima, your's can don't you get it. You all always tell me things so late that it becomes hard to solve'. I pointed out.

     'Look at you' she gestured towards me. ' Who's feeding you all these lies? You look dead Kammy, dead!.' She shouted in anger.

     'How dare you?!' I snarled ' it is your fault I fell into this mess, you all . So how dare you say that to me?' I whispered. My tears were now pouring out nonstop.

     ' I'm only stating the truth sis. It's better to believe it now'.

   'Get out' was all I said. I didn't even bother looking at her.

  'W...what? Kammy I didn't-

    ' Go away Kaima go!' I yelled at her as she cowered.

    'Kammy'

     'Leave . Now'. Was the last I heard myself say before my door was slammed shut. I screamed out hard before throwing myself to the floor . My body trembled with sobs as I lay my head on my cold floor.

    This was the height, or so I thought. I never knew the big one was yet to come.