Desiring Chances (Completed)

Chapter 27

Sabi niya hindi niya ako lolokohin... but why did he do this? Do I deserve this kind of pain? Again?

Wala naman akong ginagawa, bakit kailangan mangyari lahat ng to sa'kin? Una si Andrew... ngayon siya naman? Kaya ko pa bang magmahal sa nararanasan ko ngayon? Kaya ko pa ba?

"Nicole! Please baby lets talk... open the door baby please..."

Labag man sa loob ko ay binuksan ko ang pintuan.

I want to end this up, everything. I don't want to have any connection with him anymore, even with my family. I know it's not their fault, but I think it's for the better.

It's also my fault, for trusting too much. For letting myself fall for someone who I doesn't even know at the first place. Dapat ay ginawa ko ng bato ang puso ko para sa lalaki, dapat alam ko na ang kahihinatnan dahil lagi naman.

Pumasok siya sa loob ng kotse ko at agad akong niyakap. Isiniksik niya ang mukha ko sa dibdib niya, mas lalo akong naluha sa ginawa niya.

"I'm sorry... I know I hurt you, baby I'm sorry... I didn't mean it. I love you, I really do"

I should be happy right? He loves me... but why am I feeling like this? Am I changing? Dahil hindi ko na kaya pang sumaya kahit naririnig ko na sa kaniya ang mga salitang yan, maybe I wasn't be able to be happy with someone. Not now, and never will be.

I let my tears fall, hindi na ako mahihiyang ipakita sa kaniya na mahina ako. Dahil alam kong huli na itong pagkikita namin.

After crying my ass out, I let go of him. He seems to be hurt but I don't care. He already break my trust, and he broke us.

"I-i'll explain" He said.

I nodded. "...But don't expect too much Sky. Whatever you say, whatever reasons you have... my decisions won't change. I'll broke up with you"

Hindi ako tumingin sa kaniya, I can't look at him. Not that he cheated and break my trust already.

"I... I don't love her..."

Nagtaka man sa sinabi niya ay nanatili akong tahimik, it still hurts you know. Hindi ko padin nakalimutan ang bawat pagdampi ng labi ni Charlene sa labi niya. Ang sakit sakit sa dibdib ang makitang may kahalikang iba ang mahal mo.

I thought I love him just how I also love Andrew but I guess I'm wrong, I love him unconditionally. Mas lamang ang pagmamahal na naibigay ko sa kaniya, lahat ng bagay na naiwan sa akin noong niloko ako ni Andrew ay naibigay ko na.

Ngayong pati siya ay niloko ako... paano na ako?

That's what I was asking, I know I can't move on after this. But I know I'll be okay, ofcourse I'll ever be. I can live without a man, I can live without someone, and I can live without him.

"... Natatakot lang ako. I wasn't be able to get you a long time ago... because Andrew is your boyfriend, and when you two broke up... I took the opportunity to get you. But when Charlene found out about us... she blackmailed me..."

Now I get it, hindi ko na maintindihan ang lahat. What's with blackmail? Ano ba ang bagay na tinatago niya na pwedeng Ipang blackmail sa kaniya ni Charlene.

"What kind of blackmail? Explain more Sky, maybe you'll change my mind"

I looked at him and stared at his face, he look away. "I can't tell you"

I smiled bitterly at his remark. It was expected, I was expecting him not to tell me everything. Just like what Andrew says, he can't say what's the problem.

Isn't it the problem in couples? Hindi ba dapat ang dalawang nasa relasyon ang magkasama kapag may problema? Bakit naman niya sinasarili ang bagay na yun? Bakit kailangang itago pa sakin?