Unloved - Let us rewrite the stars ||englisch||

34.

I crept silently to the riding arena and stood at the white-painted fence. The arena, which was otherwise filled with obstacles, was empty. The only one riding alone was a girl on a brown pony. Manhattan, that was her name. The little mare, who was already quite old. Who rode her first competitions with me. Pam didn't notice me at first, not until I shouted a correction at her. She paused, then parried the mare and jumped off her back. She immediately came running to me and fell around my neck. "What are you doing here?" she asked excitedly. "Visiting my parents because it's my birthday," I explained with a grin. "You're my new big sister?" She had broken away from me and was now looking at me with wide eyes. I nodded. "That's amazing! And... uh... congratulations." "Thank you and off to the pony. Manhattan still needs to be ridden dry." She nodded and hurried back to the mare. "And Pam. Don't run near horses!", I called after her, which made her excuse herself. My dad resumed the supervision he had unconsciously ceded to me when he and Lando had become engrossed in conversation, and Lando and I made our way back into the house. I wanted to go across the pit lane one more time, though. Just like that, for no real reason. At least not a reason I wanted to think about. Because I knew that my insides were screaming for Champ. As always when I was here, I had walked past his box, given him an apple and spent the odd hour sitting next to him in the straw. Just like that. And again I walked past the apple basket, took one, arrived at his stall. I stared at the name plate, where his name was still written in my scribbled handwriting. I wanted so badly to write it then. I felt the tugging in my chest, but no burning in my eyes, hinting at the telltale tears. Just the inner pain. And that was okay. My gaze continued to wander through the box, which by now had been swept out, on to the wall where pictures and ribbons from tournaments hung. Memories of a time for which I was more than grateful. Lando didn't say anything, he had probably noticed how tense I was. At least he held my hand. I closed my eyes tightly and put the apple in the trough before turning to Lando and hugging him. I needed support when I had lost mine a few months ago, and I had found it. With Lando.

 "And we have another present for you," my mum said after pouring me some milk. I just raised my eyebrows. "You know you don't have to give me anything," I reminded her, but she just waved me off and put a small box in my hand. "And what's this?", I asked sceptically. "Why don't you stop being Hailey for once and open the present!" she grumbled at me and gave me a pat on the head. I grumbled and opened the bow. Then I practically shredded the wrapping paper to reveal a small jewellery box. I opened it too and saw a bracelet. It was made of braided, reddish-brown ribbons and a small horseshoe was hanging from it. On closer inspection I noticed the engraved name and then the material of the bands. "I that..." My voice failed me and the first tear ran down my cheek. "Yes, that's Mane of Champ." "Thank you! This is so beautiful," I murmured, holding out the casket and my hand to Lando. He understood immediately, but before he put the bracelet on me he wiped away my tears. "I don't like it when you cry," he then added quietly. With as much care as he took the bracelet and fastened it on my wrist, I wouldn't have thought him capable of that. "Thank you," I murmured again, but was then snapped out of the moment by a voice shouting far too loudly. "Happy Birthday!" Elly. I stood up and turned to face her. Feigning annoyance, I looked at her with my arms crossed. "Now don't give me that look! I have the right to shout when it's my almost sister's birthday!" she defended herself. I couldn't stay serious much longer and started laughing. The brunette hugged me and then noticed Lando. He didn't seem to have understood much except for the Happy Birthday, since we were talking in German, and just eyed us amusedly. You didn't have to know German to understand that we had just tried to tease each other again. Earlier I hadn't actually switched to German at all and had just stuck to English. With Pam, and with Mum and Dad. Probably because of Lando. But since Elly was a sucker for foreign languages, she looked quite overwhelmed when I introduced Lando to her. "Um... what?" I laughed and repeated again in German. "Lando and I are together. So your plan more or less worked." She clapped the flat of her hand against her forehead. "Oh, I see. Say that!" She held out her hand to Lando, where he also hit it and we sat down again. Mentally, I wondered how she had managed to arrange the meeting with Lando then. How had she explained to him that I was coming to stay with him for a week?

"How come Cara isn't here?" Ellison asked after a while. "I don't know. She didn't call like she usually does. Maybe she's just doing something with Jack today," I replied with a shrug. "Okay. If she has nothing else to do. It's not like it's her best friend's birthday too. And Sierra might come later too. I just don't know..." I nodded and looked briefly at Lando. "She called earlier and she's coming over later. But just for a little while," my mother told me. "Okay." I got a questioning look from Lando. At first I didn't understand what he didn't understand, but then I noticed. Elly had been speaking German, as had me and Mum. Funny how complicated that could be. "Sierra's in trouble... um... well. So it's better if she keeps some distance from you." "Now how am I supposed to understand that?" "She's afraid of being close to men." "I see. And she doesn't know me at all." I nodded. "Don't take it personally, will you?" He smiled and said no. "It's not her fault and it's not my fault either. From there. It's just good that you brought it up."

"Hey," came from a shy black-haired woman. Somehow everyone here knew where the spare keys hung. They were in and out of here all the time. But it didn't seem to bother anyone. Me least of all. That's how I had managed to avoid getting up twice today to open the door for Ellison and Sierra. I stood up and gave her a quick, gentle hug. "Hey." She looked around, overwhelmed, and lingered on Lando. The latter, thankfully, deliberately didn't look over at us, nor did the others. Everyone had resumed talking quietly. "This is Lando. My friend. He's quite nice, so don't panic, yeah?" She nodded stiffly. "I'll just introduce you and then we can go out for a moment." "Okay." She took a deep breath and took my hand. "Lando?" Immediately he responded. "Mmh?" came intently from him. "This is Sierra. Sierra, this is Lando." "Hi." He smiled, which automatically made my heart beat faster. Damn, he shouldn't smile too much. He could, but not like that. Not that careful, gentle smile that made me forget how to breathe.