GOLDEN GIRL

CHAPTER 22

Shay's POV

My hands continues to tremble by my side as I got out of the cab and made my way inside the house. I quickly wiped away the lone tear that rolled down my cheek and tried to stay calm by doing small breathing exercises. The minute I walked in, the atmosphere suddenly changes. There was a heavy bad tension in the room and the sound of glass shattering on the floor made me jump in surprise. I slowly walked towards the foyer and finally saw my mother standing in front of our butler screaming orders at him. Her appearance was a mess and just by seeing her reaction, I knew straight away that the situation was really bad than I had thought.

She swiftly turned around and saw me and her eyes narrowed into slits. I braced myself as she started to walk towards me, and clenched my fists tightly by my side.

"Mom-" It happened so fast before I could even finish my sentence.

The sudden impact made my ears ring and the strong force from the slap made my head turn to the side. I closed my eyes for a few seconds to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall before I looked at her.

"Why are you here?! Why did you let your brother go alone? Why didn't you get on that plane with him?! Why are you even alive right now?!" She screamed at my face.

She starts to hit me on the back with her hand while tears fall freely down her face, making her mascara smudge.

"You should've gone with him! You should've been on that yacht! You should've died instead! Why does it have to be my baby boy?!"

Her words was enough for the tears to break free and I couldn't stop myself from crying. I always knew that mom loves Shawn more than any of us and she never failed to show that every time they were together. She continues to hit me until our butler and the other two maids finally stepped in and held her back.

"Let go of me! You've always been bad luck in this family. Now look what happened to Shawn because of you! You should've never been born in the first place!"

My heart clenched in pain at what she said. I never knew this would happen, especially to Shawn. I regret not going to Hawaii with him, I regret saying goodbye to him when I got off the jet, why didn't I just go with him?! Why did I have to stay back?

Mom still struggled against the maids grasp, her hands reaching out to get a hold of me. I dropped down on my knees and looked down on the floor, sobbing.

"I'm sorry. I am so sorry. I'm really sorry mom. I never meant for this to happen!"

"Get out! Get out of my sight! Go away!" She yelled down at me.

Our butler, Jonas, finally forced her to sit down on a chair and whispered soothing words to her to try and calm her down. He quickly shot me an apologetic look and attend back to mom. I took it as my cue to leave so I quickly got up while wiping my tears away with the back of my hand and slowly walked upstairs to my room. I walked into my bedroom and closed the door behind me, and that's when it finally hits me.

The loneliness.

Shawn was my brother and the only family member that I feel close to and now that he's gone.....I don't know what to do anymore.

Fresh tears flowed down my face and I leaned my back on the door and slowly let myself slide down on the floor with my hand clamped over my mouth to stop the cry of pain from escaping my lips. My chest feels tight and it feels like I'm being suffocated in his hellhole all over again. With him now gone, I have no one by my side in this house anymore. No one to rely on and no one that would look out for me and no one to protect me. I'm on my own now.

I stayed in that position by the door for a while, just letting the tears flow and trying to let my head register the fact that Shawn in never coming back. The sun finally set and my stomach starts to growl in hunger because I haven't ate anything whole day but I couldn't care less. My mind was only filled with thoughts of my brother. My phone buzzed in my pocket and I slowly took my phone out and glanced at the text.

It was from Jason.

He was only texting me to say that he was looking forward to our date tonight, but I guess that's not going to happen now because I am currently in no state to go out today or maybe any other day. He still doesn't know that Shawn was my brother because I never told him the truth about me, and I wasn't planning on telling him soon either. What happened to Shawn must be all over the news right now and even if Jason saw it, it wouldn't bother him one bit or even how I'm feeling right now because he doesn't know the truth.

Lying had become an easy escape for me nowadays. It helps me get whatever I want and do whatever I want to do. So, I texted him back saying that I have to cancel our date tonight because of a family emergency. My heart sank as I press 'send' and I leaned my head back against the door and released a sigh. I have to tell him the truth someday, I won't be able to hide it for long anyway and he might find out from someone else. But even if he does, I want to be the one to tell him and I will tell him everything.

But sadly, that day is not going to be today.