Summary: Arima Kousei goes through a very traumatic experience that began to twist his fate, alter who he is, and totally take him into the underworld life. As much as he wanted to refuse the treacherous world of the rich and powerful, he knew that...
A/n: Thank you for reading my fanfiction! I hope you like this chapter!
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Miyazono Kaori POV:
There was a time that I thought I would forever stay next to Kousei even if I knew that he was doing something illegal but what I saw last night wasn't something I can swallow already. I knew that it was time for me to wake up from the fantasy that I had built myself. Kousei's a criminal. "Let's break up, Kousei."
Kousei eyed and walked closer to me. "Are you sure about that? If we break up, how sure would I be that you won't go to the police and tell them everything you know about me?"
"Would you murder me the way you did to those people under those pink roses, Kousei?" I shouted with tears flowing out of my cheeks. "I am leaving you and trust me, I cannot even fathom going to the police because I cannot trust any of them, too! How sure would I be that they aren't your spies?"
He held my arms tight and at the same time, I saw his eyes looked lonely. "You know what can happen to me if you leave this place, Kaori. The person you knew would vanish and my sanity would go away. I'll become a very different person and the only way to save me is by killing me."
"There will be a time that I will come and save you, Kousei," I answered him. "Even so, don't you think that I have to save myself first? I have to leave and I hope you allow me to leave this organization."
Kousei loosened his grip on my arms and sighed deeply. "You can leave, Kaori. I'm happy that I have met you. Let's... Let's make it official. You're not my girlfriend anymore. We're different individuals now and you can begin looking for someone else who could love you better than me. I'm sorry if I chose my family and this group rather than you. I thought that you would keep staying with me until we get married. I was wrong. Even so, leaving me is a good choice if you want to stay away from my world."
"There was a time that I thought that I will be able to swallow what Black Butterfly can do, too," I replied as I walked away from him. "What I saw yesterday gave me trauma, Kousei. That wasn't the Arima Kousei that I want to grow up with. It was as if I was staring at your twin."
He lowered his head in front of me and I saw tears cascading down his eyes. "Always remember that there's someone like me who loves you, Kaori. Goodbye, Kaori. I'll give you time to pack your bags."
Kousei hugged me and after that, he held my hands for the last time that day before he went out of our room. I know that his love for me would always be pure and true but his job had just separated us. I endured staying with him for months and years thinking that I might just become like him but I was wrong. There was no way that I can accept that Kousei was a member of a notorious crime group and what scared me most was that, he was the leader. The other men already gave me all the creeps and their aura had always felt dangerous but Kousei's very different. He turned out to be very intimidating and he has a daunting atmosphere. It was also one thing that made many of his members respect me, too. Their knees feel like jelly most of the time when they see him, meanwhile, I can stand straight next to him. As I pack all of my clothes that day, I screamed at the top of my lungs when I saw my picture with Kousei when we were mere fifteen years old. He was still a young child back in the day and he wasn't yet a heinous criminal.
Why have I loved a criminal? Why have I stayed next to him? No. I didn't love a criminal. I trusted him that he won't become a monster but I was wrong. He's now a monster just like his father. I don't want to bear any of his children, too. I don't want to be with a criminal forever. Forgive me, Kousei but I will find a way of saving you. I still love you, but I don't want to get involved with more of your crimes. There will be a time that I may be your worst enemy if I choose to stay beside you. I know deep inside me that I may become a murderer myself if I stay next to you as I could not stomach the crimes that I usually witness. Illegal drugs, murder, scams, loan sharking, money laundering, bribery, and last of all, espionage. The Black Butterfly had done all of it under the table and the police could not even do anything against you or to anyone involved! I had seen families getting broken after they lose a lot of their money because of a lot of Butterfly Group's loan sharks.
Japan became a very dangerous place to live in after a prime minister's death. Yakuza Families like the Arima Family began to take power once again after his death and our country slowly began to come back as if we were in a modern Edo Era. The new swords of today were guns. I don't understand the reason for getting his hand bloody. He should have refused. Why has he chosen to stay within Black Butterfly and get me to feel uncomfortable around him? He wanted me to leave in the first place, but then, he asked me to stay with him? How can he even ask me to stay? I felt so out of place by what he did last night!
At the time I walked out of Kousei's room, I pulled out a large luggage bag and left the white handbag that he gave me as a gift a few months ago. The luggage bag was mine in the first place and so, when I got out without the handbag, Kousei stared at me as if I looked sick. He was also accompanied by Ryota who seemed to be patched up with bandages.
"You're angry." Kousei stepped closer to me and at the same time, touched my right arm to stop me from walking away. "Can't we talk about this? I know that you're probably overwhelmed by what you saw last night. I understand that you were disturbed by it but haven't you seen me do it repeatedly already? My world is a dangerous place and I am afraid that if you leave, they will attack you!"
Slapping his face hard was like an instinct to me that the force that I inflicted on him left a huge gash on his cheeks and lips. "You're so dense not to realize that I had endured everything for you but what you did last night was the last thing I want to see. Our relationship is now broken. I still love you but I wasted my life with you! I want a normal life, Kousei."
Kousei hugged me at that time but I took his arms away from him and began pulling my wheeled luggage bag, He still tried to follow me but at the time I looked at him again before I take the elevator to get down, I saw from the reflection that Ryota stopped him. Thank you, Ryota. It's now your job to take care of him. Make sure that he won't be a notorious criminal and be the most wanted criminal here in Japan.
...
A/n: Thank you for reading my fanfiction! Yep. It was just now again that I updated this book. I lost a lot of my mood a few months ago and I had just returned. :)
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