God Had Other plans

Decision

November 10th

Aazan

I should call her- it was the only thing that came to my mind at that time, so I looked for her phone number, forgetting where I had kept it. I put my hands in my jeans pocket to look for it and sure enough I found it there. I dashed to my bedroom, grabbed my phone from the side table and dialed the number that was given to me. Her phone rang, but she didn't answer it. I tried again, but she ignored it. I figured it was because it was an unknown number, so I texted her with my name.

"Hey Zara!

Aazan here, call me when you get free."

I sat on the bed, palms glued together, arms resting over my thighs, and hands resting under my chin after putting the phone on the side table. What happened the night before with her piqued my interest: why was she inebriated?, why did she lie when I inquired her about it? and why did she seemed so afraid when I tried to discussed it?. I go on to lay on my bed with my arms behind my head, as I was adjusting my head on the bed, I noticed a plastic on which something was written; I reached my hand out to pull the plastic from the corner of the pillow, the same pillow Zara laid her head on; I noticed that the plastic had the letter N written on it. I remember seeing something like this somewhere but I couldn't exactly place it where. I tried to strain my memory enough in order to recall it but I couldn't. I assumed that this plastic had come with Zara because she had slept in my room the night before. I figured that this was probably a cosmetics related item or just some random wrapper of some kind so I stood up and tossed it in the trash. I walked over to the side table and checked my phone to see whether Zara had responded to my text. She didn't.

My family was arriving in two days, and I was excited to see them again; it had been two weeks since I had seen them. I stood up to clean up the mess I had made two hours earlier and then I was going to finish my work before heading to university for my class.

ZARA

My mother was still at work when I returned home so I was very relieved to be in a quiet calming atmosphere where I wouldn't have to say anything to anyone. I really needed a break. I went straight to my room, showered and I went into my comfort zone.

I lie down on my bed and wrap myself in the blanket, squeezing it tight. That day I felt like I was free bird which was then put back in a cage by someone who came along. Because of that lady I just met, I was going through a constant war in my head. Before she came I had a clear mind with a fear but after meeting her, I now have fear along with a confused mind.

I am not sure when but I had fallen asleep for an hour, I opened my eyes slowly and recalled that when I was leaving the restaurant my phone was almost dead so I immediately rose up to charge it with barely 2 percent remaining, I noticed that an unknown number had messaged me. It was Aazan who had sent the message.

"Hey Zara!

Aazan here, call me when you get free."

When my phone rang at the café, I mistook it for him and didn't pick it up because I was already frustrated, but it was Aazan.I put my phone on charge since I didn't feel like talking to anyone at the moment; I simply wanted to be alone and think about what I wanted, what was good for me, and which road I should take. This decision of mine will determine whether I will suffer in this same old cage I currently am in or try out a new one.

I stood up to finish my pending work because the deadlines were approaching; it is very rare for me to complete my assignments when the deadline is approaching; I have always been an organized person because of my mother; the background of her house was very strict; they used to sleep at 10 p.m. and wake up at 4 a.m. for fajr. Meals should be wholesome; everyone must eat a salad before their dinner, and at least two fruits must be consumed each day; fast food was only permitted on rare occasions; and you could not go outside after 8 p.m. My mother is not overly strict, but she has set some limits for me, such as only going out with your friends two to three times a month, and she always made me make a to-do list so that I could plan out my day, but on those days I had a tragic life where I didn't even know what was going to happen at any given moment.

I went downstairs and heard the door close and open. Somebody had entered the house and I knew it was my mother because she is the only person who comes home from work at 6 p.m. I have been having this fear every time she goes outside; I fear that he might do something to her; this fear dries my throat as I see her; she walks up to me as I came down the stairs; She put both her hands on my cheeks and looks at me with clear worry on her face, she asks me to tell her what had happened, I was still idle as she asks me to tell her what had happened once again. The way she loves me, the way she cares about me makes me realize that she deserves the same from me and it was at that moment that I was clear on what to do. I decided my next move. I made my decision.