His swan | Huaze Lei

Chapter 20: What about the pain?

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After some time Lei and Shancai were sitting in the guest room. Lei was lying on the bed while Shancai was sitting on the edge.

"What do you want to speak with me?" Shancai asked curious.

"I'm not too sure either. I just want to talk to you alone. Do you want to suggest a topic we can talk about?" Lei asked a little awkward.

"How about...we talk....our graduation trip? We went to Chongming Island for our trip. At night, we had pillow fights. We also had a bonfire. When I think about it now, it's still a very special memory. How about you? Where did you go?" Shancai said with a small smile as Lei was sitting next to her.

"Prague." Lei said simply.

"I've never been-" Shancai said turning to him only to see how close the two of them were. "Why are you staring at me?" Shancai asked confused.

"You are so ugly." Lei said with a blank expression.

"Huh?" Shancai asked in confusion.

"Just kidding." Lei chuckled. "But when I look at you this way, you're really ordinary. However, the way you looked so serious during our game today was mesmerizing. I never understood why Si likes you so much before, but I finally understood today. You reminded me of Ming....while I was training you...you even give the vibe that she used to give when she was little...boyish, bold, brave, without minding what others thought about her...Actually..." Lei stopped.

"Actually what?" Shancai asked curious.

"I'm not sure how I feel about you. Ximen said that I might be using you as a way of forgetting Jing. Maybe. However..." Lei said while thinking.

"It's alright. I know how you feel about Jing. I also know how special she is to you." Shancai said smiling and Lei sighed and lied on his back looking at the ceiling.

"Am I doing this right?" a 10 years old Meiling said unsure as she placed the card down.

"You are doing great Ming, but..." the 12 years old Lei commented.

"Oh no, there is a but. I hate when there is a but in your sentences." Meiling whined and Lei chuckled as he shook his head amused.

"You are letting your emotions show silly. In the poker game, you have to hold a poker face. Like a mask. Try to trick me with your emotions. This way I won't know what cards you have in your hands." Lei instructed and Meiling nodded eagerly. After some more rounds she sighed and put her cards down.

"Alright, enough poker, I got bored of it." Meiling said.

"What do you want to do then?" Lei asked curious.

"Drawing." Meiling said with enthusiasm as she get down of her bed and run to her desk to grab some crayons and paper.

"Um...I am not so good with drawings." Lei said feeling nervous as the girl scoffed.

"As if. Your drawings are really interesting and beautiful. I like to see you draw. And I love to draw with you LeiLei. Now let's begin." Meiling said with a cheerful smile and Lei smiled and nodded as the kids started to draw together.

"When I was little everybody used to make fun or say my drawings are odd. All except Jing and Ming." Lei informed as he remembered the flashback.

"Jing is a really special person. So is Meiling." Shancai said smiling.

"I don't know if I can love another person again. I am so confused about what I feel towards Meiling too. Although I really like you, I know it's not in the romantic way." Lei said looking up as he was still confused about his feelings towards the three girls in his life.