Memories | Dazai X Reader

Twelve • Unsettling Settlement

"I'll see you two later!"

• • •

That leaves just Dazai and Oda in the room to talk.

Meanwhile, you and Chuuya sit in the lobby together.

"How's Dazai doing?" Chuuya's the first one to mention Dazai in the conversation. He's been curious, wondering how he's been for the while. Whether or not there's been any changes, any recollection.

You pause for a moment, because how is Dazai really doing?

"He's been doing...fine," you reply, shrugging a bit. "It sometimes gets hard trying to talk to him without bringing anything from the past, but he's adjusting, and he's doing better." Chuuya sighs in nothing but relief. "That's really good to hear, [Y/N]."

"Has he gone out for breaks recently?" he questions, knowing the fact that Dazai has done it before. "No," you tell him, "but truthfully speaking, I sometimes don't know how to talk to him." He chuckles, leaning his head back on the couch that the lobby has. "I'm glad I'm not the only one. I thought it was just me, because Oda seems to be pulling this shit effortlessly."

You laugh, "Oda is truly a mystery, but what part of talking to him is difficult for you?" Chuuya traces his own gloved hands, feeling against the leather seams. "Well, I used to hate him. Well, not hate—" he pauses, glancing at you as he exhales, "—whatever, the fuck my relationship with him was—is."

He sits up, resting his elbows on his legs as he stares at you dead in the eye. "What if I say something and he doesn't like me? Like, 'I hate you' and he just doesn't reply and walks away?"

You can't help but laugh at that. "Chuuya," you say. "He's smart enough to figure out that's how you two spoke to each other. He'll probably be a little confused at first but then he'd catch on." You see Dazai and Oda coming back from the office, and you signal Chuuya by quickly averting your eyes to them and back to Chuuya.

"Shit, I'd hope," he mutters under his breath, but loud enough for you to hear.

"Where's Ango?" Chuuya asks when they walk up to you two, an unintentional bitterness in his voice. "He had to go somewhere," Oda replies, taking a seat next to Chuuya. Dazai sits next to you.

"Speaking of Ango," Oda starts, and he can see the way Chuuya rolls his eyes at the mere mention of his name. "I didn't tell Dazai in the office because I wanted all of you to hear this first—"

Just by chance, Ango passes by, and Oda grabs his wrist to pull him towards you all. All of you look at Oda wide-eyed. "What?" he asks. "He pulls me to the side all the time."

And Oda's choice of words only keep your eyes that way. Ango clears his throat, pushing his glasses up with his other hand.

"Not like that," Oda says, keeping his expression the same, but his tone is a little more rushed. He let's go of Ango's wrist. "Now, as I was saying—Ango asked me to co-author with him for a series."

"Don't you usually need a reason to co-author?" Chuuya blatantly asks without processing his own thoughts. Ango chuckles at that. "Not necessarily," Ango says, "there's cases like that if someone is injured, but I just asked Oda because I think it would be a fun project."

Chuuya nods his head slowly.

"What's it about?" Dazai asks.

Classic. Always wanting to know whatever he doesn't.

"That's a secret, it'll be a major spoiler anyway," Oda says. "Come on!" Dazai protests, "so what if it's a spoiler? I'll still read it. Besides, spoilers motivate me to continue."

Ango urges Oda to tell you all. It wouldn't hurt after all.

Besides, this isn't their own story where they don't want anyone outside looking at it, it's a series they'll be working on together. Though Oda is a little curious about how it would go.

"Just the starting and end, okay?" Oda says, not giving room to give more details. "Just don't be too disappointed when you find out it isn't the most god-like plot out there, but—imagine a young man on your porch, still alive, covered in blood, and with a lot of money on him. What do you do? Take him in and ask him questions, but the issue is that you slowly become friends with them. And then years later, you're the one that's found by him, covered in blood." And now that it's been said out loud, Ango and Oda both feel embarrassed for some reason—

Maybe it was because neither one of them talked about their ideas with anyone but themselves and other writers. Or maybe it was because saying out loud made them realize that it may not be...

They stop themselves, because thinking that the book isn't going to be worth it seems pointless, and all it does is demotivate you.

Oda clears his throat, looking at the ceiling, "There's got to be a universe where that actually happens. Maybe it's this one and we just don't know."

"I don't hate it, and I'm sure it'll be great once it's published," Dazai says.

Oda hopes that's true. It's much easier to imagine a story rather than write it. It's imagining a bunch of scenarios in your head and once they all connect—it becomes this magical thing for the writer, and all one can hope for is that the people reading the book can understand and build the same attachment.

Then again, not every work by a writer is perfect, and everyone has different opinions on writing styles, and overall genres—that also can be difficult since Oda would sometimes feel the need to please everyone with his writing.

He's glad he's gotten out of that habit, though.

A/N: sorry about the delay (and the awkward chapter cut-off) ! writing an alternate universe turned out to be a lot harder than I thought—despite constantly reading au's. I've just been trying to make sense of everything without rooting it directly back to the bsd universe, but rather hinting at it. so, hopefully chapters will come out at a more consistent rate.