Epsilon [Werewolf]

Chapter 58

Posting early cuz why not :P

*****

A scream rang in my ears. My mind was blank, and I was frozen -- completely, utterly frozen. I couldn't move, couldn't so much as think with Alia's yelling in my ears, with the dark pressure crushing everything in my head. I pleaded with my body to pull away, but it would not yield. It was as though my consciousness had been shoved to the back, another person entirely at the forefront, controlling every inch of me. I could feel the presence shaking with glee, and my heart dropped.

Azriel. Why would he do this?

"I'm sorry it had to come to this, Kyra." His voice echoed and rattled throughout my mind, and past the roaring in my ears and the incessant screaming, I couldn't quite tell if he was saying it aloud or if he was talking in my head. "You see, I knew you'd never agree to this. I'm sorry, my love, this is the only way to make you understand."

Tears of terror stung my eyes. What was going on? The metallic tang of Alia's blood assaulted my senses, and it hadn't even occurred to me that she'd passed out. The room was spinning, the faces around me blurring like smears on a canvas

'Why?' I thought. 'Why are you doing this?'

Slowly, my jaw unhinged from Alia's shoulder. I could do nothing as my shaking body sat back, falling into the very chest of the man I'd loved. His strong arms wrapped around me, and I wanted nothing more than to scream. To be sick. His presence repulsed me, and if I had to withstand him in my mind any longer, I knew I'd go insane.

"Because, Kyra," he cooed, brushing a careful hand through my hair. His voice sent shivers down my spine -- this wasn't the Azriel I knew. No, not with that wicked smile on his lips, not with that cool, scheming light in those perfect blue eyes. "We're going to conquer these lands, you and I. We'll take over all the territories and avenge all of our fallen, the people who have died such cruel and terrible deaths. 

I couldn't breathe, couldn't even think. All I could do was cry, my silent tears carving rivers down my face. 

Azriel reached around, tenderly brushing the wetness off my blotched cheeks. His touch felt set my temples pounding, and I wanted nothing more than to be sick. "Don't cry, my dear," he whispered. "This is not something you should be afraid of. With us we begin a new era. With us, we will end this torment once and for all."

"Stop," I blurted, my voice shaking. My chest shook with silent sobs, and his grip felt impossibly tight around my ribs. I was suffocating, drowning. The worst part? I didn't even have it in me to scream. 

"Get out of my head," I begged, hating how small my voice sounded. "Please--"

"I love you, Azriel," my eyes widened. I hadn't meant to say that -- I hadn't wanted to say that. But the words left my mouth all the same, words that were not mine. "I put my faith in you," my treacherous mouth continued, "I know you know what's best for us and the court."

As I spoke such false words, I shook my head, sobbing. It was only then that it hit me -- really hit me -- that I no longer had any control over my body. No, for every inch of control had been yielded to him.

"How?" I whisper-yelled after my mouth fell shut. "How could you do this to me? To your own mate?"

Silence ensued. Then, a dark chuckle rumbled from his chest. My heart sunk, and I knew I wasn't going to like his next words.

"Because, Kyra, you never were my mate. I lied to you, and yet you blindly believed it. But don't blame yourself, dear -- you couldn't have known better. After all, you've never experienced a proper mate bond."

I swallowed the bile in my throat, daggers twisting in my heart. Foolish. So, so foolish. I should've known from the beginning, from the moment he'd chosen to spare me instead of killing me. I should've known when he'd taken interest in me, always seeming to be no more than five steps away. I should have known by his subtle obsession with my power, something I'd passed off as mere passion.

I choked back a sob, but not one of terror. No, all I could feel was the cold, dark pain of betrayal. Those nights we'd spent together, those stolen kisses and whispered sweet nothings... had they all been a lie? His tears, his emotions... had they been a lie too? Had it all just been a ruse to put me under his spell?

If I had control over my hand, I would have slapped myself. Stupid -- how stupid of me to think that a three-hundred-year-old beast was actually capable of love. And how stupid of me to believe it. 

"Don't get it wrong, Kyra," came his silky voice. He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, and the urge to struggle smothered me. "I love you -- you are so dear to me. That night I found you, alone yet brave, that strange way I was drawn to you... I knew you were the one. I knew you would be the catalyst to this new era, to this new me. We may not be mates, but I knew we were bonded in a different way that night. I knew it the moment I tasted you..."

The world stopped spinning, as clarity, almost calm, flooded me. 

"You... you were the wolf who bit me."

His gentle chuckle confirmed everything. "Smart girl," he praised. "Though, I'm surprised you didn't figure it out earlier. My Zeta is a Shifter -- she changed my appearance so I could temporarily resemble someone else. I really thought you'd catch on, but... I believe I was mistaken. Then again, you seem to believe a lot of what I say these days."

He cast a sidelong glance over his shoulder, and my eyes followed. Sure enough, his Zeta stood there, a rather bored look upon her pale face. Her grey eyes were blank and unfeeling, and in that moment, the anger, desperation, and horror which had been simmering just below the surface exploded.

"Get out of my head!" I yelled, trying to thrash. "Get out!"

The invisible restraints held me fast, and pushing against them was like pushing against steel; unmovable. Azriel chuckled. "Please do not be so rash, my dear. Everything is fine."

"Then get out!" I screamed back. Azriel heaved a long sigh.

"You aren't going to make this easy for me, are you?" he muttered, as though disappointed. But then, a smile crept to this lips. "That's something I like about you, you know. You're a fighter, Kyra. My fighter."

"I'm not yours!" I snapped, tears streaming down my face. "I'm not yours and I never will be!" Pain flashed through his eyes at the remark, and I had to look away. Why was he saying these odd things? Why did he still look at me with such adoration? Wasn't I nothing but his useless pawn?

It's a ruse, I reminded myself. This man has been alive for three hundred years; he definitely knows how to fake emotions.

I tried to struggle again but to no avail. As Azriel's face crept closer, I swallowed, closing my eyes. It was too much to process, too much to handle. I forced myself to think back to that clearing in the woods, to the sparkling lake and springy mosses as hot breath washed down my nape, sending shivers of terror through my body.