how long until I fall

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I feel like the last leaf on a tree in the middle of fall. Maybe I am hanging on to keep the tree company or I am to scared to fall maybe it's because I want to prove to myself that I can hang on all by myself while my depression and anxiety string me along like I am some kind of puppet.

I don't know my thoughts run wild and I don't know what to do or to say but all I hear is ‘SHUT UP' ‘STOP CRYING’ ‘I CAN DO THIS BY MYSELF’. when I have dreadful thoughts like that all I can think of is “WHY”

Short but true full

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