Chapter 19 | Anger and locker room robbery

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HI! First, I hope you all are doing well

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HI! First, I hope you all are doing well. Second, thank you for your support, we reached more than 50k and all your feedbacks are so positive, it warms my heart so much. I know some of you are frustrated because of the slowburn, but I really think it's the best way to portray enemies. Please, don't forget they've been hating each other for five years, and how bitchy they still are sometimes with each other. Last time, the chapter ended up in a sad note. This time it doesn't! Happy read!


We did it.

We pretended to fuck.

His body stopped moving on top of me and mine stilled. In the heavy silence between us, our gazes met. Mine was fugitive, his frozen. I closed my eyelids to escape it, to escape him.

"Get off me," I murmured.

Instead, he reached out his hand.

His fingers slid against my tousled hair to reorder it, the gesture so tender and hesitant, as if he couldn't help to touch me, despite me rejecting him few minutes ago. In the icy ocean of his eyes, the glint of a match shimmered in the water. He seemed to wait for me to say something. Anything. But the uneasiness had glued my tongue to my teeth.

All the attempts at explanation that were forming in my head seemed clumsy, ridiculous, embarrassing. They would only reinforce the awkwardness between us. Make this whole thing more real than I wanted it to be.

So I said nothing. And the glint quickly disappeared.

He got off the bed without looking at me anymore, arranged his sweater that I had lifted high on his skin, then passed a hand through his hair. He quickly regained all his usual serenity, all the self-control that I had loved to see him lose just because of me.

"Let's go back downstairs."

After running a trembling hand over my face, my fingers holding back for good the tears under my eyelids, I gathered my last bits of good will and slip out of bed too. 

So the H duo fucked at Oliver's party. Word would soon spread like wildfire, our names would be coughed out of every mouth. Tomorrow, I would officially be Elijah's girlfriend.

The deep relief and satisfaction I had imagined I would feel in taking this step seemed hopelessly absent in the mosaic of emotions that lay in my heart. Not even a small fragment of joy, a single tessera of excitement I could find.

I literally ran into the bathroom after we left the room, taking advantage of friends of his coming to greet him. I ran cool water over my forehead, easing the tension, not giving a shit about the makeup, then against my neck, my wet fingers gently caressing the hickey Elijah had left.

I camouflaged it behind my hair and then bit my lip nervously, realizing that I should expose it instead for everyone to see. See that I had become his. I didn't particularly mind the idea as it was part of the tenants of our fake dating. I wasn't really his, he wasn't really mine. Only pretending purposes. 

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