Save Me (Levi x Eren)

Chapter 1 - Bad habits

A.N
!!TRIGGERING!!This is my first story so please bear with me through the beginning. It is mostly focusing on the immense sadness eren is feeling for this chapter. :(

Eren's P.O.V

I woke up from a light 4 hour sleep. That was the best I could hope for, falling asleep on a tear soaked pillow. I have no love nor hate in my heart. Just an empty pit. I feel like my mind is caving in on itself. Every second of every day I am in pain.

I sat up on my small bed, and rubbed my tired eyes. I felt the constant pain in my heart. Tears filled my eyes, I would never be able to count the number of times i have cried. I thought about myself, why am I like this.

Both of my parents and my adopted sister died in a car crash. ever since then I felt only pain. I couldn't handle all of this, all of it was too much." I CANT FUCKING HANDLE THIS" I screamed in agony. I screamed into my pillow crying. I had once tried to commit suicide. I swallowed every last Tylenol, sleeping pill, and Prozac. My friend Armin who was helping me at the time, found me on the floor of my room. he immediately bought me to the hospital. I was in a coma for 4 days. I wish I had died. there was nobody that i had to care. No body would stop me. I was alone in this filthy fucking world. I had tried to slit my wrists down the middle, but it never cut the fatal artery.

Stop being sad they are dead get over it.

I cant.

STOP BEING SAD.

I cant.

Always the same answer.

I walked up to my dresser, i looked into to second to last droor and lifted all of my clothes.

There it is.
My best friend.
The razor blade.

I pulled up my sleeves. Tears fell onto my mutilated wrist.

I slashed the blade across my skin.

I stopped crying and let out a heavy sigh.

I put my blade back in its place, and put a napkin on my bleeding wrist.

What a filthy habit.

It helped.

It reminds me i can feel something other than sadness.